Orphan at Heart
by Lixia
Summary: After an interesting re-union, Quistis thinks she's fallen in love with Seifer. Seifer also realizes he's fallen for Quistis as well. Only, he has a past and a new present he can't share with her. If he did, all would be lost... (Chapter 11 Up)
1. Plans for Quistis

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII, nor am I a part of Squaresoft. This fic is purely for entertainment purpose only, and a bit of matchmaking.

Authors Note: This is a fic about my favorite couple ever in FFVIII – Quistis and Seifer. This story also involves the characters, and places in the FFVIII world, however not all the events may be mentioned, and things are changed. Still, the story takes place after the whole Sorceress Wars.  

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Orphan At Heart

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Written By: Lixia

CHAPTER 1 

          Sleep engulfed all of Balamb Garden that night. Everyone had enjoyed a busy day of working out, studying, and training for the SeeD exams that were to be held the following week. Sleep seemed to drone on everyone. Well, everyone except for Quistis. She had so much work that could not go un-noticed and the situation of Squall and Rinoa's wedding wasn't helping her either. She felt the need for a serious vacation. 

At least, before Squall and Rinoa made their eternal vows. Rinoa had practically begged Quistis to be bridesmaid.

However, Quistis felt unsuited to be a bridesmaid. Her feelings for Squall long before hadn't disappeared totally, and she didn't think being a bridesmaid would help her.

And though she sometimes had a temptation for it, she didn't want to ruin their wedding. For the first time, Squall seemed to be genuinely happy. On the occasion, Quistis would even notice a weak but apparent smile on Squall's seemingly stone face. She was completely awed by the fact that Rinoa was the one capable of doing that in a short period of time, when she'd been trying for years. 

To ruin that would make Squall unhappy, and that was the last thing she wanted. She wanted Squall to remember her for being a great friend, not a person who ruined his life.

So in the end she agreed, much to Rinoa's excitement and Selphie's enthusiasm. Selphie seemed to become increasingly giddy—if that was even possible. 

They all seemed glad that Quistis agreed to the offer. Squall had come up to her and said that a wedding without her involved would seem incomplete. That made her smile. 

But now that she agreed, her whole life at Balamb Garden was bound to the wedding. She was expected to show up to Selphie's 'Wedding Meetings', and listen to Zell practice his best man speech ideas.

They all felt Quistis knew everything there was to know about weddings when she probably knew less than they did. She never attended a wedding in her life. She never heard about how weddings were prepared, and the detail behind it all. She never knew her parents, and thus _couldn't_ have known what weddings were like from her parents.

Worst of all, she'd never taken an initiative to do some research about it because after Squall proposed to Rinoa, she felt she never needed to look through any wedding catalogs for herself. Selphie would take care of that. 

She came to a conclusion that she would be destined to remain alone. 

It often depressed her to think that way, but she reminded herself that the truth could hurt. She checked her watch. It read 2:54 AM. She couldn't stay awake any longer, or she wouldn't get _any_ sleep.

There was much to do for the upcoming week. Quietly, Quistis left the Secret Area she'd spent the whole evening in, and made her way back to the dormitories. Often she would just stay still in Balamb Garden's quiet halls, admiring its peace and quiet.

The fountains that surrounded the center elevator continued to spout water, sparkling in the pools, due to the scattered lights in the water basin.

Only the soft trickling of the water could be heard: both calming and romantic, despite it being a school.

Quistis shook her head. She was nothing but a hopeless romantic. She couldn't drown herself in emotions that were never hers to begin with. Immediately she went to her dorm room, without another thought on the fountain.

          By morning, Selphie was frantically knocking at Quistis' door.

"Quisty! Open up! I think I have the perfect dress for Rinoa. You've got to see it!" she exclaimed. 

Quistis, in a groggy mood opened the door, just so Selphie would stop knocking. 

"Morning Quisty!" she said, a big grin on her petite face. Her hair was in its usual style; the ends of her hair were turned upwards, brown and shiny.

She was also wearing her usual attire: a yellow short dress and her brown leather boots. Her smile was kind and giddy, and her eyes sparkled like a little girls on Christmas day, as she held out the wedding magazine towards Quistis. 

Quistis on the other hand had her beautiful blonde hair all tousled from sleep. She had her blue towel-robe on, and she still seemed sleepy. In addition to that, she definitely was not in the mood for looking through wedding magazines. Of course, the look on Selphie's face made Quistis realize she couldn't let her friend down.

"Come in Selphie," Quistis said hiding the exasperation in her voice. Selphie nodded, and entered the room, oblivious to Quistis' bad mood.

"I'm so glad you're going to be Rinoa's bridesmaid! Do you know, I heard she was going to promote you to Maid of Honour! Isn't that great?" 

Quistis, who had been taking out her usual outfit from the closet stopped suddenly. Her outfit fell to the floor.

"What? Me? But…ugh…that's just peachy." 

Selphie nodded happily. Clapping her hands together she giggled, "Rinoa said you're really nice, and she knows how you and Squall used to be close. She thought it was only right if you were the Maid of Honour. I thought that was a great idea!" 

Quistis said nothing. Maid of Honour…her? There was no way that she would be Maid of Honour. If Rinoa knew _how_ close she'd been with Squall, she wouldn't even invite her to the wedding, let alone give her such an important role. Suddenly she felt sick. Sick with guilt.

She quickly changed and took a look through Selphie's magazine. 

"There's a really nice dress that I think Rinoa would look _absolutely_ gorgeous in. Here, let me find it…" Selphie said, taking the magazine from Quistis' hands. She began shuffling through the pages, her eyebrows knit in a frown. 

"I know it was in here _somewhere…_" she muttered. 

Quistis sighed. This whole wedding and the feeling of being without any type of fulfillment was starting to become increasingly depressing. Somehow she felt empty. She thought Squall would make her feel complete, but he went and met Rinoa. Now they were getting married, and she was left to stand in the rain…

"Quisty? Quistis! Hey! I found it, you know!" Selphie said, waving her hand in Quistis' face. 

"I need a break…" Quistis said exasperated. 

Selphie looked at her blankly, then gathered her magazines, "Oh...well...I could always come back this afternoon! I'll bookmark this page, and---"

"No, I mean a vacation. A week or something away from here…" Quistis explained.

Selphie shook her head, her expression suddenly more serious. She dropped her magazines, and kneeled beside Quistis. 

"Are you all right, Quistis?" 

Quistis shrugged, "Honestly Selphie, I don't know…" 

Selphie seemed to be in deep thought. "If there's something wrong, you know you could tell me," Selphie offered, suddenly feeling bad for her friend.

Quistis shook her head, "No, I think I just need a bit of time to myself to sort things out." 

Selphie nodded in understanding. "You could talk to Headmaster Cid about it…" she suggested. 

"Yes, that's a good idea. I think I will…you won't tell anyone about this, will you? I don't want everyone to know about it…especially not Rinoa or Squall." 

"Of course not Quisty. Your secret is safe with me!" Selphie said cheerily. She then picked up her scattered magazines and headed to the door. "Take care, Quistis," she said, before she opened the door, and left. 

"You too," Quistis replied quietly. A break was everything Quistis wanted right now. She felt it would definitely give her an opportunity to sort out all her tangled feelings out. 

She went to her mirror, grabbed her brush and began to run it through her golden hair. Stroke after stroke the gold became increasingly shinier until Quistis felt it nice enough to pull it into the usual style. She left to parts to hang about her face then tied the rest behind her. She put pins and tied her hair before she looked at herself for final inspection.

She hoped Cid would let her have a week off. On her way to Cid's office, she met Xu.

"Instructor what brings you to Cid's office?" Xu asked, in her professional politeness. Quistis didn't want to tell Xu she was planning a break…in case of later conflicts.

"Just discussing some matters with the Headmaster," Quistis replied, which was in part, true.

"And you?"

Xu smiled, "Just the same, Instructor. I hope he isn't busy." 

Quistis nodded in agreement. Luckily for the both of them, Cid was having his morning coffee, having woken up less than an hour ago.

"Yes?" he asked, when he saw the two women. Quistis allowed Xu to talk with the Headmaster first. She felt that she needed more privacy with Cid, rather than have Xu overhear.

It seemed like an eternity while Quistis waited outside Cid's office. Slightly nervous now, she wrung her hand and rehearsed what she would say in her mind. She didn't know how exactly to bring the issue up without sounding desperate or unhappy, though she was. Especially sine Balamb Garden was undergoing exams, Quistis felt it would be more difficult to discuss the matter of vacation.

She just hoped Cid would have some sympathy. He always _did_ seem to be an understanding man.

When Xu finally came out from his office, Quistis stood up, a big shaky and entered.   
"Ah…Instructor Trepe, what brings you in here today?" Cid asked, standing in front of his desk, his hands behind his back.

Quistis tried to smile. But it slightly faltered. All of a sudden she felt like breaking down and crying. A very shameful thing to do.

"Is something the matter, Instructor?" he asked again.

Quistis shook her head. Then slowly nodded. She felt like such a child.

"Sir, I … I've come here because…I think I need a break from all of it…" she started.

  
Cid moved towards the chair behind his desk, picked up his coffee and sipped it. "Go on…" 

Quistis explained the lost-ness she was feeling, and the need for sorting out all her emotions. She didn't know how else to put it. 

When she was done, Cid rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I had a feeling you were under stress like this…of all our Instructors, you seem to be the most tense. Never smiling, nor laughing lately…I'm glad actually, that you've come to suggest something like this, my dear. I will have arrangements to get a substitute Instructor while you're away…" he said. He approached Quistis and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Just get some rest, and sort things out." 

Quistis nodded gratefully, "Thank you very much, Sir." 

Leaving the Headmaster's office, Quistis returned to her dorm to begin packing. Cid told her she could leave tomorrow, since a taxi would be waiting for her. It was so generous and understanding of the Headmaster to do this for her. She almost thought of him as the father figure she never had but truth be told: he was just her boss.

Nevertheless, she was happy that her request was granted. She didn't know whether she should inform the others. She decided it was best not to…at least not to Rinoa and Squall who may get ideas from her request for disappearance.

Selphie knew…but she didn't know _why_, she was leaving. All of a sudden, Quistis felt alone. She didn't have anyone to completely share her secrets with. She couldn't possibly tell Selphie. She just wasn't the type of person she would trust her secrets to, though she was genuine. 

While packing, Quistis wondered how she would go about relieving herself of all the feelings she was feeling. She had to forget the wedding, and all other love-related issues. She couldn't think of Squall on her vacation either. It would only make her more unhappy.

When she was done packing, she went to teach her last classes. She also had her last minute chats with her friends. Rinoa and Squall left early during dinner hour to the Secret Area, for what, Quistis didn't want to know. 

Irvine sat back, sipping his drink, "So how was everyone's day? Mine was so…like, boring." 

Selphie shrugged as she flipped through a magazine. It seemed she was the only one really serious about the wedding.

Zell grinned as he finished his hotdog from a pile of ten. "Mine was awesome. I don't think I've had a day as great as this in a long while. Though the best day of my life was the day we beat Ultimecia and saw Seifer run like a scared little boy." He began to laugh.

Quistis suddenly wondered what happened to Seifer. Or Raijin and Fujin for that matter…

"I wonder whatever happened to him…" Quistis muttered.

"Eh? Ya mean Seifer? Psh! Who cares! He's finally gone! I'm glad of it! Hope he never shows his back-stabbing face here again!" Zell said defiantly.

Quistis shrugged, "And Fujin? Raijin?" 

Selphie closed her magazine, "Oh I don't know…they all seemed to have disappeared. Rumour has it that they died in the Sorceress Wars with Ultimecia. They all got sucked into a time portal or something. But I liked Raijin. He was the only nice one. Fujin didn't really like me, I could tell…" she sulked a bit. Irvine patted her back.

"Fujin was hard to get along with. Besides, it was hard to understand her one-word sentences anyway," he said, assuring his girlfriend.

"Well, I dunno about you, but I'm gonna get some sleep. I've got training first thing in the morning. Good night, y'all!" Zell rose from his seat and began his walk out of the cafeteria. Selphie nodded, but remained in her seat. Irvine stood up as well, and tipped his hat. "I better go too. Good night ladies,"  he said with a wink before leaving as well.

"Selphie?" Quistis said, turning to the younger girl. 

"So did you talk to the Headmaster?" she asked. Quistis nodded. She didn't think Selphie would have cared much. But she did, and it made her feel accepted, and almost regretful.

"I leave tomorrow morning…"  
  


"And you didn't tell them?" Selphie wondered. 

"No," Quistis said, "I don't want them to be worried, or in a fuss about why I left. I love them all dearly, but I've got to find myself, and…I can't make my leave such a big deal. I'll be back in a week anyway…"

Selphie nodded. She got up from her seat and waited for Quistis to do the same. "Well Quisty, I do hope you find what you're looking for. And if ever you want to talk to someone, come straight to me, all right?"

Quistis smiled, "Sure." Selphie hugged her friend, and then the two left the emptying cafeteria. 

When Quistis returned to her dorm, she closed her luggage and sat at the foot of her bed. It was strange…how all this was actually happening. She was loved by her friends. She knew that. But that wasn't all she was looking for now, and she realized that. She was just in need of space to sort out her feelings about Squall right?

She sighed, partly in exhaustion. It was all confusing and unknown territory to her. She felt so foreign and unsure of herself right now.

This vacation was going to help her out. She knew it would. She reassured herself as she laid down to bed. After listening to the rhythm of her breathing for a while, she began to fall asleep, the last thing on her mind was Squall and Rinoa, leaving the table earlier than needed. 


	2. On the Way

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII, which is unfortunate. =P But anyway, this fic is purely for entertainment purposes only. 

Authors Note: Hope you're all enjoying this fic so far. If you haven't read Chapter 1 yet, I suggest you do, although…it probably wouldn't kill you and get you all confused if you didn't. 

Oh and sorry it took so long…^^;; I've been rather busy lately. 

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Orphan at Heart

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Written by: Lixia

CHAPTER 2

          When morning came, Quistis was already awake and awaiting the taxi. Shortly after the sun touched the paved grounds of Balamb Garden, the yellow car arrived. Quistis loaded her two suitcases into the trunk and hopped in.

"Where to?" the taxi driver asked.

"The Balamb Garden train-station, please." Quistis replied as she closed the door.

The driver nodded and slowly they pulled out from the little pick-up spot. She watched from inside the cab as the familiar sight of Balamb Garden slid away from her. Then she turned to the front. The trip was silent, except for the low sound of the radio in the car. Quistis sat quietly listening to her heart beat.

She didn't know why heart was pounding all of a sudden. She assumed it was because she hadn't been on a vacation by herself before.

The taxi trip was shorter than Quistis expected when she paid the man 30 gil, grabbed her bags and walked up the steps of the Train Station. She decided a trip to Deling City wouldn't be so bad. Then maybe a short trip to Winhill, where Laguna used to live after. She would travel for a bit, and enjoy her week of complete freedom. 

"Good morning Miss. Where would you like to go today?" the train ticket man asked her from behind a little counter in a booth. 

"Deling City," Quistis replied, and readied her money. She was surprised that she actually going to go about doing this. 

"350 Gil, please." 

Quistis paid the man, and took her ticket.

"The train will arrive in one hour's time," the man said. Quistis quickly thanked the man and decided she needed breakfast. And since she had an hour to kill, it would be the perfect thing to do. She walked away from the booth to one of Balamb's famous restaurants and went in, baggage and all. She took a table for herself and quickly ordered a coffee and some pancakes. When the waitress walked away from the table after taking Quistis' order, Quistis noticed a man sitting at the bar. Blonde hair, cut short, trench coat, strong and built, and…a scar…Seifer?!

She rubbed her eyes and looked again. No one was there.

Her heart beat again. Was Seifer just there? Or not? 

"Here's your coffee and pancakes," the waitress said all of a sudden, breaking into Quistis' train of thought.

"Oh. Right, of course. Thank you," Quistis said hastily. 

"Are you all right, miss?" the waitress asked worriedly. 

Quistis nodded, "Of course I'm fine!" she said, "Why wouldn't I be?" she smiled a reassuring smile. 

The waitress looked at her oddly, but shook her head and walked towards the kitchen, leaving Quistis to her breakfast. 

  
Once again Quistis looked to the bar, hoping (for some odd reason) that Seifer would be there. He wasn't. Disappointed, but unsure why, Quistis ate her breakfast slowly. 

                                                          *  *  *

When Quistis was done and paid for her meal, the train was to arrive in 10 minutes. She grabbed her bags and made her way back to the train station to board her train. 

Her little cabin and seat were nicely furnished, even for so cheap a price. She guessed it was because no one traveled during school-time, so tickets were cheaper. It didn't matter to her anymore. She was now officially to begin her long-awaited vacation. She sat back in her seat and let her mind drift away…

                                                          *   *   *

"Come back here!!" a shrill voice screamed. 

"Quickly Raijin! Grab it and _run!_" the man in the trench coat shouted, his gunblade raised above him. 

"I'm _trying_ to, ya know?" Raijin cried out. He took the white package and tucked it under his arm, as he ran from the woman. 

Once they were out of distance for the screaming woman to chase them, Raijin dumped the package on the ground. 

"Why do we have to take this from that innocent woman anyway? Man, I hate this, ya know?" 

"ROTTEN." A silver-haired woman added. Her black eye-patch covered her left eye, and her good red-ruby eye glared at the blonde man.

"She isn't innocent at all…her husband owns the one of the greatest drug-dealing company, besides. I told you guys. This is a no-choice deal. We either get killed, or we do this. And frankly, I'd rather keep my life for another week or so."

Raijin shook his head, "How we even got into this, I really can't remember, ya know?"

"SEIFER."

"Yea, Fujin?"

"BASTARD."

Seifer grumbled. "Well then, die! I told you! We have no damn choice! Just deal with it!" he snapped. Fujin said nothing, but turned her ruby-eye to stare at the environment around them.

"So…what do we do now? We have to give it to him as soon as we can, ya know?" Raijin said. Seifer nodded briskly. He bent down to pick up the package.

"We're in debt to this guy. I can't fucking believe it," he sighed. 

"BELIEVE." Fujin said then.

Raijin nodded, suddenly feeling not so angry at Seifer anymore. 

"Wasn't your fault, ya know? We needed money, and stealing wasn't the way we wanted it. He gave it to us. Never expected to end up stealing for him anyway, ya know?"

Seifer held his head in his hands miserably. "I'm so damn frustrated. Why did we even bother to start this kind of life?" he asked to no one in particular. 

                                                          *   *   *

"Now arriving at Deling City. Please remain seated until train comes to a complete stop. Thank you." 

Quistis woke up to the sound of the train-stewardess' announcement. Once it had come to a stop, she grabbed her bags and stepped out of the train. She took in her surroundings and followed the crowd to the gates entering Deling City. She couldn't believe she had actually made it. She nearly went to a phone to call for Squall and the rest of them. Just to tell them she had arrived. But the purpose of not telling them she was going in the first place was to avoid them. She would stick to her plan. 

"Welcome to Deling City! May your stay be joyous!" a man greeted each tourist with a plastered grin. Once Quistis was into the city over the gate, his voice, repeating the same line continued though his voice faded as she moved further away from him.

"I wonder how much _he's_ getting paid for saying that…" Quistis muttered.

First thing she needed was a place to stay and leave her bags. She looked around her and found a grand building that she assumed was the hotel, since big letters spelled out HOTEL.

When she entered it, she was amazed at how well furnished it seemed to be, just like her cabin. A classy grand piano sat in the center. Along the wall was a receptionist booth, and in the center of the lobby, above the piano was a crystal chandelier. Couches were scattered around the lobby, and she saw to her right a staircase leading downwards where she could hear a song being played on the piano. 

All in all, the hotel impressed Quistis. She felt she was going to enjoy her stay in Deling city, as the man at the gate had wished her. 

                                                          *  *  *  

"Seifer, we can't just wallow in self pity, ya know?" Raijin said, laying his hand on his friend's shoulder. "Don't give up just yet. There may be hope for us, ya know?" 

"CORRECT." Fujin agreed, "HOPEFUL."

Seifer lifted his head so he could see his two best friends. "You're right." 

  
Once Seifer was on his feet, the three of them left the alleyway they had used as their safe-escape place with the package concealed within Seifer's trench coat. 

"Let's have some dinner! I'm starved ya know?" Raijin suggested, his mood brightening. Seifer didn't seem so happy, however. 

They had to get out of Deling as soon as possible. But the problem was they didn't have the money. His hopes died like a flame killed by a bucket of cold water. 

Fujin noticed his scowl. "PROBLEM?"

Seifer turned and faced her. Honestly, yes. But he couldn't tell her. "No, of course not," he said, a bit more bitterly than he meant. Raijin stopped in front of Deling City's grand hotel. "Here's a good place for dinner," he said, and the two followed him in.

  
It was fifteen minutes later when they were settled into their table on the lower floor of Deling City's hotel. The piano was played by one of the pianists that had Julia's playing style. Seifer ordered a drink, and leaned back in his seat. He crossed his arms and closed his eyes as he listened to the music being played. 

                                                                   *   *   *

Quistis felt that now, having spent an hour or so in her hotel room, she was fully unpacked and began to get hungry. A small dinner in Deling Hotel's restaurant wouldn't be bad, she decided. She left her room and walked down the hall, already feeling so much more relaxed.

She headed down the stairs, and a waitress led her to a table. It wasn't a single person's table either. It was a table merely for a group of at least two or three.  Again, she felt the feeling of loneliness. She didn't have anyone to talk to during dinner: no one to listen to, or complain to. She almost felt like returning to her room, and order room service. But she didn't.  She couldn't.  It would almost be like giving up. On what, she couldn't quite put her finger on, but it felt like she was quitting. 

When her drink had arrived, she took a sip, and tried to drown herself in the music playing on stage. 

The song was romantic and sad, almost matching the golden-haired girl's mood. 

When the song ended, Quistis saw the girl rise. She appeared to be very beautiful, just like her playing. Quistis applauded her, adding to the already grand applause and the young pianist bowed. 

A microphone was placed before her, at that moment, and she took it and began to speak. 

"Good evening everyone. For years I've studied the art of music, and I've taken a large interest in studying a brilliant pianist/singer. Her name was Julia. She used to play in this very room, so tonight I will sing one of her most famous songs, as a tribute for her gift she brought to the world."

She stopped talking, holding the microphone in her hand, taking a breath. The audience remained silent. The young girl then began to sing a beautiful song Quistis remembered all too well. Even she had fallen in love with the song, and the girl's voice was so beautiful: 

_Whenever sang my songs,_

_On the stage, on my own,_

_Whenever said my words,_

_Wishing they would be heard_

_I saw you smiling at me,_

_Was it real? Or just my fantasy? _

_You'd always be there in the corner_

_Of this tiny little bar…_

_My last night here for you,_

_Same old songs, just once more,_

_My last night here with you?_

_Maybe yes, maybe no_

_I kind of liked it your way,_

_How you shyly placed your eyes on me,_

_Did you ever know,_

_That I had mine on you?_

_Darling, so there you are,_

_With that look on your face,_

_As if you're never hurt,_

_As if you're never down_

_Shall I be the one for you,_

_Who pinches you softly but sure,_

_If frown is shown then,_

_I will know that you are no dreamer_

_So let me come to you,_

_Close as I want to be,_

_Close enough for me, _

_To feel your heart beating fast,_

_And stay there as I whisper,_

_How I love your peaceful eyes on me_

_Did you ever know,_

_That I had mine on you?_

_Darling, so share with me,_

_Your love if you have enough,_

_Your tears if you're holding back,_

_Or pain, if that's what it is,_

_How can I let you know,_

_I'm more than the dress and the voice_

_Just reach me out then_

_You will know that you're not dreaming_

_Darling, so there you are_

_With that look on your face,_

_As if you're never hurt,_

_As if you're never down,_

_Shall I be the one for you_

_Who pinches you softly but sure, _

_If frown is shown then, I will know_

_That you are no dreamer. _

Immediately, the crowd burst into applause. Quistis clapped, now feeling as if she could cry. Somehow that girl had the power to filter such emotion into her song, as if she had been through all those words herself. 

Seifer clapped to the girls performance. "Not bad, ya know?" Raijin grinned, as he too applauded. 

Fujin remained untouched. Her expression seemed like stone, but she too clapped.

"Seif, we better deliver the package now…" Raijin said suddenly, his expression grim. Seifer checked his watch, and nearly swore. 

He should have expected it, "Yea, let's go," he said. As the pianist sat down to play again, Seifer rose and his friends followed.

Leaving the payment of 50 Gil, he headed up towards the stairs when he nearly stumbled.

"Whoa! What's the hold up, Seifer? We have a deadline, ya know?" Raijin exclaimed.

Seifer ignored him. Instead, he turned to his left and recognized a face he'd not seen for over a year and a half.

"Quistis Trepe?" he said, stepping up to her table. 


	3. Suteki da ne?

Disclaimer: I do not own FFVIII, and I'm not part of Squaresoft. I'm definitely not Hironobu Sakeguchi either. I wrote this fanfic purely for entertainment purposes, and cuz I love Quistis and Seifer so much! ^^

Authors Note: Chapter 3 is up! Woo! I'm still busily writing, while at the same time, trying to keep my marks up at school. -_-;; Anyway, please, please, please, leave a review when you finish reading!! I'd be forever grateful!

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Orphan at Heart

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Written by: Lixia

CHAPTER 3 

          The blonde woman looked up and her eyes widened. "Seifer?" 

Raijin and Fujin came up behind Seifer, as if they were his body guards.

"The only one. What brings you up here, Trepe?" Seifer asked, his voice back to its usual arrogant self.

Apparently, Quistis didn't like the sudden change. "Almasy, I'm here on a vacation, and I'd prefer not to be called 'Trepe.' I'd like to know what _you're_ doing here in Deling. None of us at Balamb Garden has heard from you. There were rumours about you being dead, too." 

Seifer shrugged, stuffing his hands into his pockets gruffly. "Well, I'm not dead. And I've just been…hanging around," he said. Quistis grabbed her champagne glass and took a sip.

"Well, what have you been up to since…" she trailed off, unsure of how Seifer would react if she had finished her sentence. 

"The death of Ultimecia? Yea, we've been just great. Doing stuff. All three of us. How's Puberty boy and chicken-wuss?" he asked, smirking the usual Seifer-smirk.

Quistis took offence to it. "Seifer, I thought by now you would have given up on those silly names. Squall and Zell are both very high-ranked SeeD's now." 

"Heh."

"Seifer, we can't stay and chat, ya know?" Raijin said in a low voice. Seifer nodded, almost forgetting the package hidden in his coat.

"We've got to go, Instructor. Perhaps we can talk again some day?"

Quistis nodded, "Whatever. Who knows when we'll met again?"

The three of them left in such a hurry, that Quistis was suspicious as to why, but didn't bother to follow them. It was really strange that she would meet Seifer and his friends here in Deling. Especially since she truly thought they may have died. Either that, or she thought they were living in some small town where they wouldn't be publicized. Yet they were in the biggest city: Deling. It didn't make much sense.

She didn't know what to think of Seifer's re-appearance. Not to mention, his sudden change of attitude, as if he accidentally revealed the face behind the mask. 

It boggled her mind. However, Seifer's appearance reassured her of her stay here, because at least she knew _somebody_, even if she detested him. 

By the time Quistis was back in her hotel room, she began to wonder where Seifer lived in the city. She didn't even know why she cared. She remembered how he was always such a trouble-maker back when he was still a student in Balamb Garden. He'd always dared Squall to fight him, and the two of them would always try to beat each other in everything. But Squall never boasted, or showed any outrage. Seifer on the other hand usually taunted him, and boasted whenever he beat his rival.

She never realized how much had gone by over the years, and the Seifer she presently met didn't seem to be any different. By much. 

When she settled into bed, Quistis stared at the ceiling humming the song "Eyes on Me" softly. Her own voice seemed but an echo, and then, it too faded as she fell asleep. 

When morning came, Seifer awoke to the scent of burning rubber.  "What the hell is that?" he cried out, getting to his knees. Raijin groggily awoke beside Seifer, sniffing the air. 

Seifer then realized where he was: in an alley-way, where someone was trying to warm their hands by making fire in one of the large trash-cans.

He sighed, leaning against one of the brick walls near him. If working for Ultimecia through lies wasn't hell, this was.

They still hadn't been able to make enough money to get them a decent living place. 

                                                                   ***

When Quistis awoke from her comfortable sleep, she grabbed her robe and walked over to her window. She gazed out and wondered where Seifer was in the large city. _Why am I always thinking about him?_ she wondered angrily. He was arrogant, stuck up and a former enemy of Balamb Garden, of her friends, of…her. Yet she still wondered. 

Shaking her head, she stepped away from the window, and quickly went to the shower. 

Once the hot water soaked her in it's warmth, she could feel herself being rejuvenated, and any thoughts about Seifer disappeared, running down into the drain like the water. 

By the time she was ready for breakfast, her usual Quistis-self was back. She grabbed her purse and went down to the restaurant of the Hotel. 

After a fulfilling breakfast, Quistis was ready for her first day of vacation to do anything she wanted. She looked out the window and saw the streets, crowded with shops galore. A sudden thought, very un-Quistis-like came to her mind. She would shop 'till she dropped. It was the perfect way to forget her problems she left at home. It was a way to change herself, and remind herself she wasn't going to be Quistis Trepe, Instructor of Balamb Garden, but rather…Quistis Trepe, a woman who previously had too much on her mind. She quickly paid for her breakfast, took her purse, and began her excursion. 

By afternoon, Quistis was just about ready to call it a day. She couldn't remember the last time she'd shopped so much—or spent so much money. _Wait…that was never._ It was true. She had never been on a shopping spree like this before. Sure, she'd gone shopping, but only when Rinoa and Selphie dragged her out of the door. And that usually took some time. 

But on her own? Never. She wasn't the typical girly type as Rinoa and Selphie were. Yet here she was, with bags after bags of items under her arms. It almost made her feel gleeful. Much like the way Rinoa and Selphie were after they'd gotten a good deal on a pair of shoes or something. 

On her way back to the hotel, she hurriedly went along the semi-crowded streets when she accidentally bumped into someone. 

"Oh! I'm sorry," Quistis apologized, not once looking at the person. She was too busy making sure nothing fell out of her bags. 

"You better be, _Instructor,_" said a deep and arrogant voice. One that could only belong to one very annoying and arrogant man. Seifer.

"What are you doing, bumping into me, when you know I have my hands full! Why, something could have fallen out!" Quistis said, irritated. Her sudden apologetic expression was replaced with one of rage. 

"Don't be a bitch Instructor. Is that any way to treat someone you've nearly knocked over, anyway? I could have _died_, if I fell over and hit my head." Seifer asked, the grin on his face provoking her.

_I'd slap him if I didn't have my hands full…Almasy, I would slap you so hard, I'd break that pretty face of yours._

Quistis took a deep breath and ignoring him, looked behind him. "Where's your possé?" she asked.

Seifer shrugged, "We split our separate ways for the afternoon. I don't know where they went, but I was on my way to the hotel to find _you._"

"Me? Why me?" Quistis asked in confusion, her anger drained from her. Suddenly she saw his smug face.

"Caught you off guard, didn't I?" he smirked.

"Jerk." 

Seifer chuckled at his own trick. 

"Honestly Seifer…grow up," Quistis snapped, pushing past him. 

"Instructor," Seifer crooned after her.

Quistis ignored him, "I'm not going to fall for anymore of his jokes…why I even thought he may have wanted to come to talk to me, I don't know…" she muttered to herself, passing the buildings until she reached her hotel.

Once she was past the hotel entrance and about to get onto the elevator, she nearly dropped her purchases and had a heart attack.

"Seifer! What the _hell_ are you doing here?" She was shocked to find the man in the trench coat standing right in front of her.  

"Like I said. Here to find you. I wasn't joking back there, although…I'm sure you took that as a joke. Why would I want to talk to the likes of you, right?" he stated. 

_Shut up, Almasy…_ Quistis thought angrily. She didn't answer him.

"I'm serious. Anyway, I need to talk to you about something. You may be my only hope for something important." This time his expression and tone of voice was dead serious. She hoped it wasn't a trick, because she totally fell for it.

Looking at him, she kept her skeptic expression in case Seifer _was_ playing another joke. "And why me? Why not your little gang?"

"Who? Raijin and Fujin?" he laughed, "They can't help me. They're in this with me, first of all." He stopped short, then added, "Of course…I'd prefer we not discuss it here."

Quistis looked behind her and noticed a line of people.

"Hey are you going to get on the elevator or not?" a burly man asked angrily. He shook his fist at her, and a couple of other people behind him had the same look. Quistis smiled sheepishly, pushed Seifer into the small elevator cubicle, loaded herself and her shopping bags with her; a handful of people followed her. 

As the elevator made it's several stops for the other visitors staying at the hotel, Quistis felt questions flood into her mind like water.

She took a glance at Seifer, wondering why he was even talking to her. He caught her glance and winked.

Quistis looked away.

When they finally reached their floor, Quistis grumbled about her key. It was in her back pocket of her skirt, and with all her purchases she couldn't quite reach it. Seifer took notice of Quistis' lack of hands to get her key.

"Where is it?" he asked.

"In my back pocket," Quistis replied.

Seifer nodded, then reached for her back pocket. As he neared her buttocks, Quistis turned away from him.

"_Relax_, Instructor. It's a damn key. I'm not going to _rub_ your ass," he snapped.

Quistis stopped, suddenly realizing it _was_ a bit stupid. "Just hurry up…" Quistis said, exasperated.

Seifer reached for her pocket again, grabbed the key from her pocket, and slid it through the door slot. After a moment, the light turned green, and a 'click' sound was heard. The door opened. Seifer turned the handle, and opened the door for Quistis. She didn't acknowledge his courtesy, but rather walked in and dumped her bags on the one bed in the room.

Seifer followed her in, closed the door behind him, and entered the main part of the room. He took a quick look around, and settled himself in one of the chairs near the window.

"So?" Quistis began, her hands on her hips. Seifer said nothing for a moment. Then, "You're quite the character, Instructor," he said suddenly. 

"The what?" Quistis asked, taken by surprise. 

"Interesting--" he continued as if he hadn't heard her, "how I used to despise you," he went on. "But then again, you _do _get bitchy quite often," he smirked. 

Typical Seifer. "Are you going to just sit there and insult me, Almasy?" Quistis asked angrily.

"Of course not, Instructor." He said. "How's Puberty Boy?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Firstly, I'm _not_ your Instructor, any longer. Call me Quistis. And **_Squall_** is doing fine. He's getting married to Rinoa," she explained. A sinking pain stabbed her heart as she said those words. 

Seifer's usual arrogant expression disappeared from his face. "He's _what_?" 

"You heard me," Quistis said, uncertain of why he even gave a damn about Squall. Until she realized he and Rinoa had a history.

"Heh. So Puberty Boy is typing the knot with Timber Owl's Perfect Princess…looks like he's finally growing up.." Seifer said, covering up his previous falter. 

Quistis nodded. "But that isn't why you came here to talk to me, is it?" 

"No. No it isn't." Seifer sighed. "Quistis…" he began, then looked her in the eye. He seemed to hesitate at first, but then he seemed to muster the courage to ask, "Tell me honestly…what would you do if you had no money?"

_What was this all about?_ Quistis wondered.


	4. A Deal with the Devil?

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII, or any of the contents from the game (including characters, which is rather unfortunate…but probably for the best ^.~;) , but I do own this story line. 

Authors Note: Chapter 4 is finally up! Keep the reviews coming! I really hope everyone of you are enjoying this story. Actually I'm having a lot of fun writing this. And it seems to be forming quite nicely. So yah…leave a review message when you're done reading this. It'd be greatly appreciated!

--------------------

Orphan at Heart

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Written by: Lixia

Chapter 4

          Frowning, Quistis wondered what Seifer was talking about. "I…" 

"You wouldn't be able to live, would you?" Seifer broke in, "No more vacation, no more fine dining, no more…well you wouldn't be able to purchase _all_ those things." He said, pointing to the piles of bags on her bed.

"Hell, you'll barely be able to eat." 

"What are you saying Seifer?" 

"My job isn't earning me much cash. Occasionally we get our ups and downs, but most of the time we're fresh out of income." 

"And you want to take some of mine, do you?" Quistis asked. She was pretty much appalled that Seifer would ask her this. She barely knew him! And she despised him!

"No…not exactly. Damnit, Quistis. Let me explain to you…we, well, Fujin, Raijin and I need to borrow some money. Just for a short period of time. We'll return it back to you once we get our next paycheck." 

"Where do you work anyway? Why don't you just quit, and get a new job?" Quistis interrupted. 

Seifer shook his head. "You don't understand. I can't just quit any ol' job and get a new one with the snap of my fingers. No one's forgotten my past. Everyone cringes at the sight of me. If they don't, it's because they hate me so the anger blinds them, or they ignore me as if I don't exist. I can't get a new job because no one wants to hire me. Fujin and Raijin are in the same situation. They've wreaked havoc, thanks to me, and they refuse to leave my side. So people naturally think we're all monsters out to get them." 

Quistis sat at the edge of her bed in deep thought. Suddenly she felt a pity for Seifer, something she never would imagine having. She almost wanted to help him out. But she wasn't exactly loaded either. Especially not after the shopping spree. She looked at him, watching him.

He looked almost fragile at the moment. He had his head in his hands, slumped forward. She didn't know Seifer was capable of looking genuinely pathetic. Pathetic in a piteous sense, not the usual hot-shot, full-of-himself pathetic look. 

Suddenly she had an idea. "Maybe you could come back with me to Balamb Garden next week. You, Fujin and Raijin. If we talk to Cid, I'm sure he'll let you three re-enroll and you can study to become a SeeD again." She suggested.

Seifer looked up at her, a flash of hope glinted in his green eyes. It disappeared as fast as it had appeared, and he looked down again.

"I can't go back there," he muttered. 

Quistis looked puzzled, "Why not?" 

"They hate me there worse than they do here. Puberty Boy will make it his duty to boast about his perfect little heroes life," Seifer grumbled bitterly.

"Hmm.."

"And everyone knows how I can't stand him! Oh, and that blonde kid…Chicken-wuss…" Seifer sighed. 

"You could try to mend things. If you gave it time, everything could be fixed. You're so quick to judge, Seifer. Maybe that's why nothing's worked for you. Besides…how can I be sure I can trust you?" she asked with sudden caution.

"Listen. You don't need to give me much. I just need enough to get a place to stay for the night, and dinner. When the week is over, I'll give you what I owe you and I'll be out of your hair," Seifer explained. "Besides, what am I going to do? You have a case on me that you'll win automatically. If you say I'm a lousy rotten thief, everyone will believe you right off the bat." 

Quistis remained silent for a moment, going over the possibilities and consequences if she complied to his plan.

"All right," she said, finally. Something seemed to tug at her, telling her this was right. And for some odd reason, she felt a sudden connection to the blonde man in the trench coat; something she didn't have with him before he came into her room and talked to her like a normal person.

"Thank you, Quistis." 

"But…under one condition. Don't think I'm going to give you something for nothing," she said, as Seifer rose from his seat. "In return, I want you to come to my room every night until you repay me my money. Just to talk, maybe get to know one another a bit more. Besides, I have to keep an eye on you, ya know?" 

Seifer nodded, suddenly chuckling.

"What's so funny?" Quistis asked.

"Just…don't quote Raijin next time," he said, then approached her. "I appreciate this," he said, taking Quistis' hand, his tone suddenly very serious. A red tinge fell across her face, and she shook his hand.

"I'll see you tonight, then," he said. Then he checked his watch. "I've got to meet Fujin and Raijin." He left apologetically, where Quistis bid him goodbye till tonight, and closed the door.

There was something very different about Seifer. He was so…unpredictable.

As Seifer left the hotel, he wondered what he'd gotten himself into. Now he had to see her…every day. To talk? Talk about what? He leaned against the wall of the hotel and sighed. 

"Seifer! Hey man…where were you?" Raijin yelled, coming up to him. 

"Just…taking care of some things," Seifer said coolly. 

"WHAT?" Fujin asked curiously. 

Seifer shrugged, "Nevermind it, lets go." 

They walked away from the hotel. Seifer couldn't help but feel like he had accomplished more than borrowing money. It was a strange feeling, one he was foreign to, but it was there, and he didn't like it. 

Fujin noticed the look in Seifer's eyes. It looked almost as if he was a zombie. 

"AWAKE?" she asked him. Raijin looked over and wondered what in Hyne was going on. Then he too saw Seifer's expression of deep contemplation. In a moment, as if things dawned on the blonde man, he was back in reality. 

He glanced at his two friends and growled. "What the hell are you two staring at?" he snapped.

"You looked kinda dead. Just worried, ya know?" Raijin shrugged. 

"Well don't worry. It's not like I have any diseases or something," he said.

"FINE." Fujin said coldly, her eye never leaving Seifer's face.

Once they returned to their usual alleyway, Seifer explained to them that they would soon be able to afford a ticket out of Deling. The two friends both took it well. "Out of this dump?" Raijin asked, the excitement in his voice was apparent.

"FREEDOM." Fujin added, patting Seifer on the back. 

He smirked. "Yep, by the end of this week, we'll be out of Deling, and we'll be on our way to start a new life."

However, he did not explain to them _how_ he was getting the money. They were both too excited to care at the moment, and Seifer hoped it would remain that way. 

"Oh and I have to meet someone tonight, so don't mind me. And eat at some restaurant by yourselves to celebrate tonight." Raijin and Fujin's expressions returned to the usual seriousness.

"Who?" Raijin asked curiously. 

"Just…someone. I'll be getting the money tonight." 

"And you're sure he's not some other crook? We have bad luck in making friends, ya know?" Raijin wondered. 

"No. Not a crook," Seifer assured them.

So by the time the sun set, Seifer bid his friends a good dinner and a pleasant evening, and returned to the hotel. 

                                                                   * * * 

Quistis looked around her room, realizing it was still rather messy. She had packed away the gifts for her friends, then crawled into bed to try and rest. All was well in her dreams, until someone came into them. First it was Squall, and she was there embracing him. But as she gazed into Squall's ice-blue eyes, they somehow changed colour. It was slow at first, but then the blue drained out and was replaced by green. Squall's once brown coloured hair changed to blonde hair, and Squall's attire slowly changed to the simple gray trench coat. 

Yet…she was still embracing the figure. 

Then she woke up, shaking her head. _What an odd dream…_ Quistis thought. She was no longer able to sleep, so she tried to find something to do to get her mind off it. 

"How could this be?" Quistis wondered, "the first man I see other than Squall, and I'm going school-girl on him?" She shook her head in disgust. Suddenly she hated Seifer. She hated him for getting her involved in his life. 

Until he was at her door.

"Good evening Quistis," Seifer greeted her.

"Right on time," Quistis remarked, moving to allow him in.

"As usual. You know me, ne?" Seifer smirked. 

Quistis shrugged.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Seifer asked, staring at the framework on the dresser. He saw the money for him on top and took it. Quistis nodded in acknowledgment.

"Just anything. Things you've been up to…you know…small talk," she suggested.

  
Seifer nodded, "Sure, okay. I worked in a crummy job as a fisherman. The first day was great. We were all enjoying ourselves. And then we quit. Got a new job, and well…that's hell, so we're thinking of quitting…" _even though we can't…_ "but hell, I needed the money. There. So now you know what I've been up to."

Irritated, because this was **not** what she had in mind, she snapped, "I'm not here to interrogate you, Almasy. I just wanted to have a nice conversation." 

"Okay, okay. I was never very good with this conversation crap, and you know it," Seifer retorted.

"You can try, can't you? Would it kill you?" Quistis asked angrily, her hands on her hips. 

"No, but your oh-so-tough Instructor's glare might," Seifer mocked. 

Quistis threw her hands in the air exasperated. "You're a hopeless cause, Almasy!"

"So I am…" he said in triumph. They both sat in silence before Quistis interrupted. 

"Isn't there something you wanted to know about your former life, and what you've left?"

  
Seifer shrugged, "It doesn't bother me. It was all in the past anyway. They all hate me, and that works well, because I hate them all too." He sat still, in bitterness. 

Quistis wondered how Seifer could go on living, hating and being hated. Respect and love from others was something she valued, even though she never showed that to her friends. Without it, she believed it was what made a person who they were. And yet, she had no love, and maybe that was what made her so vulnerable. 

"What are you thinking about?" Seifer suddenly asked.

Quistis took a moment to snap back to reality," Just…things. I don't see how you can stand hating everyone and everything and having people hate you in return. Don't you feel rotten?"

"Quistis, I've felt rotten ever since I set foot in the Matron's orphanage. From the start, I've been rejected by you, Puberty Boy, Chicken-Wuss, my family. For Hyne's sake, I've tried to fit in, but you were all so hard to deal with. Chicken-wuss cried about any little thing, even if he had his spikey hair in a muddle. Puberty boy wouldn't talk. He was so attached to the Matron, and stared out to space most of his spare time. And you—" Seifer shook his head. "Rotten childhood equals rotten Seifer. End of discussion," he concluded.

Quistis shook her head, "That's not true. You can change. And besides, you had Fujin, Raijin there with you. You even had Rinoa…"

"Rinoa," Seifer scoffed. "She was…my everything…but I didn't know how to deal with things like that." He wondered how much he was going to tell the blonde woman in front of him. "Instead of me pouring my guts to you, why don't you tell me why you're here in Deling. You gave me a vague excuse last night. I want to know why you _really_ came here." 

Quistis wore an expression of surprise for a moment, then wrung her hands nervously. 

"I…wanted to get away from it all…" 


	5. It Starts with a Breakdown

Disclaimer: Same as always: I don't own the characters; I don't own Squaresoft. But I own the storyline. 

Authors Note: Chapter 5. Finally. After…a year, almost? ^^;; Please leave a review after you read it. Then I'll know that someone reads it. O.o… and that I'm not purely writing this for my own pleasure, but for the pleasure of you, the reader as well. ^^

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Orphan at Heart 

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Written by: Lixia       

  
Chapter 5 – It Starts with a Breakdown

"It all?"

Quistis nodded. Was she really going to tell him? Before she knew it, she was telling him everything. She didn't know why and she was so ashamed at herself when she had finished.

She told the man she used to hate, and barely knew every little thing that caused her anguish. She told him about Squall, and her love for him, her lonely days at Balamb Garden, her Instructor responsibilities, and her jealousy of Rinoa.

Tears brimmed her eyes, and though she tried to control herself, she found that she couldn't. All the pressure built up over the years finally exploded and all to a stranger she didn't even trust.

"Shh…Quistis…" Seifer's hands grasped her gently but firmly.  She was unaware of his caring demeanor at the moment, and didn't know whether to look at him or not. She kept her eyes squeezed shut as she cried; her head was down so he couldn't see her, and her hair was covering her face.

"Come on Quistis…" Seifer said softly, and lifted her face so he could see her. 

Suddenly Seifer noticed she wasn't crying as an Instructor, but crying as a lonely child who had remained strong for all those people she called 'friends' through _their_ tough times.   
And yet, here she was in need of those friends and no one was there for her. He nearly felt that same pain himself, and somehow, for some unknown reason, Quistis' pain cut through him.   
Why? He didn't know. They were partners in a business agreement. Nothing more. Hell, he had planned on running off with her money in the long run, never to return again, but something made him come back to her. Something he couldn't even explain himself. Why did he feel a strange attraction to her as soon as he saw her last night? He shook his head. It was nothing. Many were attracted to the blonde. It was obvious why. She was hot. Why else would she have those Trepies? They were all made up of young boys still desperate for a girlfriend, or undergoing puberty. No love there.

"Quistis, don't let this get to you," Seifer said, brushing a strand tear from her soft cheek. "Forget them. Forget all those people you've tried to please for all these years. Forget Squall." 

Quistis sniffed and gingerly tried to get up. She harshly wiped away her tears from her face as if she was unaware how she was treating herself, and slumped on the chair Seifer previously sat in. 

He stood over her, genuinely concerned. Quistis remained silent, clutching a tissue in her right hand. Occasionally she wiped at her tears, but still, she didn't say anything. Her mind was so sick and tired of all her built up emotion. But she heard Seifer plain and simple. _Forget Squall, _he had said.

"How could I?" she asked quietly.

"Huh?"

"How could I forget Squall?" she repeated; a fresh stream of tears ran down her face, as more pain was reminisced. 

"Easy. Clean your mind of all Squall-ish thoughts," he said, then smirked, "can' be too hard, ne? He's not a very memorable character. He's kind of like a wall." 

Quistis stared at him blankly, and then suddenly as if she really saw that, she laughed. Her ring of laughter lifted Seifer's own spirits, he was glad she was getting her humour back. 

"A wall?" she asked uncertainly.

Seifer nodded, "A cold hard brick wall that doesn't deserve the likes of you," he continued. 

"Can a wall really handle your bitchy Instructor-ness?" he added.

"Oh shut up, Almasy," Quistis grumbled, reaching over the table. She grabbed a pillow and threw it at him. Seifer chuckled as he caught the pillow. "It's progress. Don't you feel better now?"

Quistis wiped the last of her tears and looked down. "Thank you Seifer."

"For what? Insulting Puberty Boy? Ha. Pleasure's all mine, Instructor." He winked. 

Suddenly it seemed as if a friendship was beginning. Both Quistis and Seifer could feel it. They now shared a bond and it was one they never thought could have happened. Not when Quistis thought Seifer was nothing but an arrogant bastard.

And not when Seifer thought Quistis was nothing but a boring, grumpy Instructor.   
Now they seemed to find out that they were indeed very different, but very much alike.

When Seifer left for the night, a new warmth grew in Quistis' heart. For the first time in all her years, she felt like she had found the true friend she'd always wanted. He was the one person who could truly understand what she was going through because he'd felt worse and could relate.  
When she closed the door behind her, she suddenly realized he'd shown a side to him she didn't think existed. He had tried to comfort her. He had gently held her, and told her not to worry.

She saw the tenderness Seifer was capable of. She quickly opened the door, and walked out into the hall, expecting to see the gray of his trench coat. 

But he was gone.

  
Seifer left the hotel, feeling rather uncomfortable. His heart felt like it was being squashed into a tiny little pit. Somehow that denial about attraction was a flimsy borderline. He'd talked to her once intimately, and he already felt bonded to her? That was crazy. 

He quickly met up with Fujin and Raijin, and they asked him where he had been. He made up some excuse about business and showed them the money. Both seemed to be carefree at that point. They found a crappy motel and stayed there for the night. 

Seifer lay awake, running the theory of love through his mind, while listening to Raijin snore and Fujin's subconscious complaints about the cheap bed underneath her. All the while, he felt guilty about the money. He would have to repay her eventually now, and he didn't know how.

Four days passed since the night Quistis broke down. That meant there were three more days before the end of her vacation. She wished she had taken a two-week break. Seifer spent the second evening with Quistis discussing the art of gunblading and how he had come to become a gunblade warrior. In return, she told him about her own choice of weapon and the two seemed to have a relatively informative discussion about their weapon. Any mention of the previous night seemed to be forgotten between the two, but their feelings towards each other seemed to stay. 

The next day, Seifer decided he wanted to talk to her more than just the evening hours, and invited her to go to the Shopping District just to get away from the hotel room environment. More and more, Seifer felt unsure about his love theory. Four days and he had suspicions and a ton of denial. 

Quistis was in the same boat. Her feelings of Squall were beginning to fade, but she remained in denial as well. There was no way Seifer and her could be anything but friends. Even friends seemed an impossibility. 

On the fourth day, Seifer had a call from Mr. Fletcher—the crook he had been dealing with. He had been thinking about what he and Quistis should do to spend the day. He looked over at Raijin and Fujin as if they had grown another head. "What? Now?"

Raijin nodded forlornly. "I'm afraid so. He has a new assignment for us, and he's gonna make sure we do it right. I think he means business, ya know?"

"Since when did he _not_ mean business?" Seifer sighed. That meant he would have to cancel his plans with Quistis. "I'll be back in an hour, and tell me if Fletcher tells you anything more." He was out the door before Raijin could say anything. 

"Damn Fletcher. Damn him to hell," Seifer grumbled, as he made his way to the hotel. His almost carefree life was shattered by the mention of his name. 

When he got to Quistis' door, Seifer knocked twice before she opened it. "Seifer, aren't you a bit early?" Quistis asked. Then she noticed the distressed look on his face. "Seifer, what's wrong?" she asked. 

"Quis, I don't think we'll be able to meet up today. I…have a business assignment," he explained. Quistis looked disappointed, but she nodded and smiled. "Yeah, it's fine. Besides, I've been wondering how you were going to pay me back for that money you borrowed." 

Seifer nodded, "Heh. I've wondered myself. Anyway, so I'll try and see you tomorrow then."  
Quistis shrugged, "Sure. Tell me if you can't make it." 

"You know I will," said Seifer. 

The two stood still for a moment in awkward silence. Then Seifer stepped away from the door. "So see you later," he said. 

"Yeah, see you…." Quistis trailed off. Seifer backed up further then turned to walk down the hallway. He turned the corner and disappeared. 

Quistis…there was something about her that he couldn't quite figure out. He knew that if he had let himself do so, he would have approached her and kissed her. He shook his head as he got to the elevator. No. He and Quistis were nothing but friends. That was probably all she thought of him anyway. 

When he returned to his two friends, they were already prepared to do what they were told by their leader. "Well?" he asked. 

"Fletcher wants us to steal him a package of arms. Some bomb missiles or something. Why us? This is ridiculous, ya know?"

Fujin continued sharpening her weapon: a circular blade, but said nothing. 

"Well let's just get it over with then. Where to?" Seifer asked, picking up his own gunblade and hauling it over his shoulder. Raijin gave him the directions leading to the abandoned warehouse basement where a 'business man' was to be waiting for them. He was rather surprised at how easy it was to smuggle illegal material from city to city, especially in a busy place such as Deling. 

"He's only got one crate for us, and Fletcher expects that we take them from him in the full. He had someone deliver this package to him in exchange. It'll be our hides if we don't make it, ya know?" Raijin continued. 

"DANGEROUS." Fujin spoke up. 

"Yeah. Can't get caught, but luckily nobody lives there so we should be fine, ya know?" 

Seifer remained silent as they headed out the door and towards the building. He had his weapon concealed from the few pedestrians he happened to pass by, but as they neared the 'dumpy' part of Deling, no one was around. It was definitely as deserted as he had assumed it would be. Steam rose up from sewage holes, and broken parts of buildings, cars and anything else was strewn around about them. Garbage scattered every corner he could see, filthy and unappealing. Graffiti decorated the sides of the abandoned buildings that still stood. Clouds hung above them dark gray, as if signaling a bad omen. All three of them felt uneasy as they walked through the deserted streets. "Picked up the perfect place for stealing missiles," Seifer muttered under his breath. His companions said nothing. 


	6. The Dark Side of Seifer

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, nor do I own Squaresoft. I only own the storyline.

Authors Note: Chapter 6. Yay. Phew. Enjoy, and please review! I'm in the process of writing Chapter 7 now. 

-----------------

Orphan at Heart

-----------------

Written by: Lixia

CHAPTER 6 – The Dark Side of Seifer

Quistis kept herself busy that night by going over what she felt. It was…odd. She didn't know what to think about Squall anymore. He was some guy she'd known and loved, but Seifer was right. When was he ever there for her? She was always there for him. Squall always went to Rinoa and was there for her. Now she had begun to admit that she was falling in love with Seifer. There was something about him that made her heart melt. At first she denied it, as a way to mask her feelings for Squall, but she'd never felt that true sense of belonging as she had felt whenever she was with Seifer. All she felt when she was with Squall was pain and hurt of rejection as well as anxiety. Seifer made her laugh. He knew things. He understood her. Did Squall? She barely had a chance to _talk_ to Squall, what with Rinoa constantly clinging to him. The only question now was…did he feel the same way about her? 

Would he tell her he loved her too, if she told him? 

                                                          *        *        *

"Grab them and get outta here!" Seifer yelled to Raijin. Same scenario. He and Fujin would remain behind to fight while Raijin ran off with the goods. A dozen guard soldiers surrounded the three of them. "Where's the money Fletcher promised?" 

Seifer said nothing. They had found out once the businessman opened up the package that there was no money left inside. There was nothing but a blank piece of paper. Fletcher had used Seifer and his friends as bait to grab the material and run, knowing they valued their lives enough to stay alive. 

"Well?" 

Seifer didn't bother replying even though the tone was harsher. He wasn't going to stick up for Fletcher and his way of cheating on people. He felt ashamed that he once used to cheat on people in a similar way Fletcher did. He could protect himself as long as he needed, but he was _not_ going to say he was part of Fletcher's men, and promise on behalf of the bastard that he would get some payment. 

"Fine. Have it your way." The missile dealer snapped his fingers and the battle began. 

Seifer swung his gunblade out in front of him and with a slash across their chests, had three men easily defeated. Raijin on the other hand was having difficulty escaping with a crate under his arm, while trying to protect himself. Fujin came into contact with the soldiers giving Raijin trouble, and with the first sign of escape, Raijin ran. "Meet you guys later!" he yelled. Fujin nodded, forcing her own weapon on one of the soldiers who tried to run after Raijin. The soldier dropped to the floor with a 'thud'. 

When all the soldiers were killed or injured badly – Seifer and Fujin showed them no mercy-- the missile dealer remained sitting behind the boxes, looking awfully timid. 

"_Don't_ try to run…" Seifer said, almost sinister-like. "I'd say to you to tell your boss something, but…you won't be alive to tell him, would you?" 

Without another word, Seifer swiped his gunblade across the man's neck, cutting through skin, flesh and bone, not leaving the man a chance to even whimper. 

Fujin couldn't believe what she saw. Seifer, in the heat of the battle had decapitated the man. Seifer turned to look at her, a flame in his eyes that meant serious danger if he was to be dealt with. 

"Come on," Seifer said gruffly to Fujin. His expression had drastically softened, and a bead of perspiration ran down his forehead. He lifted his hand to wipe it off, then wiped his gunblade on the man's business suit. Blood continued to spill from where the neck used to be, soon pooling over the floor. 

They quickly left the building.

"This better be it…" Seifer muttered under his breath. He had calmed down quite a bit since killing the missile dealer. But suddenly, he felt ashamed. He realized what he had done, and how uncivilized it had been. He had been driven to do it, he knew, but that was no excuse for doing what he did. And he felt ashamed that he had actually …enjoyed giving the man what he deserved. He couldn't possibly make dirty money for Quistis, his newfound friend. Nor could he stand to disappoint her by saying he had killed a man the way he did. It wasn't the first time he had gone on a blood lust like this either. 

  
As they made their way out of the dumpy side of Deling, Seifer watched for any sign of extra soldiers who may have been called by the missile dealer before his death. Surprised at the man's lack of knowledge in doing business with the number one crook in Deling, Seifer and Fujin made it back to their crappy motel room unscratched. 

"Hope Raijin's all right…" Seifer murmured, but loud enough for Fujin to hear. 

Fujin nodded but said nothing. She had seen Seifer in his blood-lust mood, since not seeing it for years, and it almost scared her. Seifer sat still, waiting.

"Why do you do it?" a female voice then asked, breaking the silence.

Seifer looked up from his dozed off position, to find the person the voice belonged to. "What? Fu? Did you just…"

"YES." Fujin replied, back to her monosyllables. 

"But you…"

"I do, when I have to." Fujin replied.

Yes…it was true. He shouldn't have been so surprised. She'd talked in full sentences before. It wasn't that she couldn't speak sentences; it was that she chose not to. However, it was a long time since he'd heard her talk like a normal person. "What do you mean, 'why do I do it?'" 

"Kill the way that you do."

"I…" Seifer didn't know how to explain himself. The feelings of shame returned. "I don't know, Fujin. Maybe it's some darker evil left from the Sorceress War…"

"That's no excuse to do what you did. You…_chopped that guy's head off_."

"I know…and I didn't know why I did it." Seifer sighed, bringing his hands up to his face. He didn't want Quistis to know he had this blood lust in his personality. 

"So…who's this person you're getting money from?" Fujin then asked. She believed Seifer really didn't know why he did what he did. 

Seifer looked up, thankful for the change of subject, only to realize this was even harder to answer. "If you really want to know…" Seifer began, but hesitated. If he told her, what would she think? Fujin was already disappointed that he had killed the missile dealer. 

Fujin never liked Quistis, and how would it affect the growing friendship he and Quistis shared?

"WELL?" Fujin had gone back to her original speech patterns.

"It's…" Seifer had a feeling he would regret telling her later, but he couldn't keep it from her for long, "Quistis," he said reluctantly. 

Fujin's eye widened for a split second, "INSTRUCTOR QUISTIS?" she asked.

"The only…" Seifer said.

"HMM…"

"I know you don't like her, Fu, but …well…I do. I mean, I used to hate her as much as you do, but…after we got to know each other more…" Seifer tried to explain. He had no idea where he was going with it.

"Do you…LOVE HER?" Fujin then asked. It took Seifer by surprise. He stood still, thinking over the words. Four days, he'd spent time with her. Was four days enough to justify love?

"I…"

"FOOL." Fujin spat. Then her hard expression softened. "You _do_ love her. I can see it in your eyes. Maybe you don't know it yet, but…you do. I knew that whoever you were getting money from was something more than just a business ally."

"Is it that obvious?" Seifer asked, exasperated. His denial theories about love suddenly broke down and he was left with the feeling of vulnerability. 

"NO."

"No?"

"I can tell. Raijin can't." Fujin stated. "No one else can tell." 

"What do I do?" Seifer asked.

"HMM?"

"About Quistis. If I _do_ love her, how do I tell her? What do I do? I've never been through something like this before…" Seifer sounded like an idiot. 

Fujin chuckled, a smile creeping to her usually stone-faced lips. "Go to her now, and tell her. Just…say it." She said. 

"What about Raijin?" Seifer asked. He didn't want to abandon his two best friends.

"I'll wait for him." Fujin said, waving her hand, "GO."

He thought it over for a moment, and then decided to follow Fujin's advice. "Thanks, Fu," he nodded. He ran out the door and raced to Quistis' hotel. He felt like such an idiot, running about lovesick like some sappy fool from the crappiest romance novel, but the way things were going, he couldn't exactly help it.

Fujin made him realize, even before he did, that he was in love with his former Instructor. It wasn't the fact that she was beautiful that attracted him either. She was smart, calm, and most of all, she was a person. She was someone he could comfort, be comforted by, and not be judged. She had taken the time to know him unlike most of the people he'd met. He just hoped she would feel the same way he did. 

                                                          *        *        *

Quistis opened a book she brought from Balamb Garden, ready to read it when a knock came to her door.  "There's no room service needed her, thanks!" Quistis shouted, too comfortable to want to leave her chair. 

However, the knock continued a second time, breaking Quistis' concentration. She tried to ignore it, staring hard at the inked text on the page, but the person knocking her door remained persistent. 

The third knock, then the fourth. Quistis nearly slammed her book down on the coffee table beside her, but instead, lay it carefully upon the smooth forest green surface. She walked to the door, now a bit irritated. 

She opened the door, a little wider than what proved safe, and sternly said, "What do you—" but her voice died away as she realized whom it was. 

Seifer stood outside her door, breathing hard. 

"Seifer? I thought you…"

"Got out early," Seifer lied. 

Quistis nodded, "Come in," she said. Seifer said nothing else, but stepped into her room. He felt stupid. No. Worse than stupid. Even when he thought he'd loved Rinoa, he didn't feel like he did now. He felt tongue-tied; he hadn't even rehearsed how he was going to tell her. 

"Quis…" 

"Yes, Seifer?" Quistis looked at him intently. She looked so happy, yet she was serious…Seifer guessed she knew he had something important to say. 

"Hmm…." Seifer tried to make something up to make himself sound less foolish than he felt. Quistis approached him and stood in front of him, as if trying to read his expression, making him feel a little uncomfortable. The heat from her body was making him grow hotter, and he swallowed hard. All he wanted was to kiss those soft pink lips and devour her right on the spot. 

"You look distressed," she said, "do you want me to make some tea or something to soothe your nerves? Was it that assignment?" 

Seifer shook his head, "No…it's all right. I'm fine. I'll be…" _Now or never…_ a voice in his mind told him. 

"Quistis, I have something to tell you…it's…important." 

Quistis stopped moving, turning to face Seifer. Her expression was unreadable at the moment. "So tell me…" 


	7. What Now?

Disclaimer: Yet again…really…do I have to repeat myself every time? O.o   I don't own FFVIII, I'm not part of Squaresoft, and the only thing I own regarding this story is the storyline and the events that take place. 

Authors Note: I'm at Chapter 7. Eeeeee! I'm so glad I made it this far. Now my goal is to finish chapter 8. =P Well, a big thanks to everyone who left comments. For all those who read it, please leave a review after reading! It would be greatly appreciated. ^_^ Well, enjoy. 

--------------------

Orphan at Heart

--------------------

Written by: Lixia

CHAPTER 7 – What Now? 

Seifer swallowed hard, forcing himself to say what he had come here to say. He laid his hands on her shoulders, feeling a tingle down his spine. 

"I…never knew that I could be capable of anything like this…especially not in four days. I've…oh hell, Quistis, I think I love you." 

He watched her reaction, hoping he wouldn't receive what he expected: a slap in the face. 

Instead, Quistis gasped. He didn't know what she was thinking, but she remained speechless.

Quistis gasped, her heartbeat quickened, and she could hear the blood pump in her ears. Had he just said what she thought he did? She didn't even think it was possible. 

Seifer remained his stern serious self. "I tried to deny it. Four days, Quistis…and I've gotten to know you. I had no idea this could happen, but I had to tell you." 

A misty look came over Quistis' eyes, and suddenly she threw her arms around Seifer's neck. The action threw Seifer off for a moment, but then he too wrapped his arms around her waist. Then Quistis did something no Instructor appeared capable of doing. She met his lips with hers, and kissed him. 

Seifer felt her soft lips press against his, and returned the kiss wholeheartedly. He didn't think this was real for a moment; not until he felt her body against his, did he know it was reality. 

When she broke off the kiss, he was almost disappointed, but then she whispered, "I love you too." 

Not another word needed to be said, as the two hugged each other tightly. 

  
Quistis felt unable to control the tears coming to her eyes. If she never knew happiness before, she did now. Any thoughts of Squall, and any past feelings for him completely disappeared. Seifer loved her. Nothing could make her happier, and nothing else needed to. 

Finally Seifer murmured, "You do?"

Quistis blinked, then laughed. "Of course I do. Don't get me wrong…I tried to deny it, after all…who would have thought that four days could bond two people into love? Well...I certainly didn't. But you were always there when I needed you this week. And you've shown me a lot about myself no friend could ever do." 

Seifer nodded, holding her closer against him. He laid his chin on Quistis' soft blonde hair. "But what happens now?" he whispered. Thoughts about Fletcher, Fujin, Raijin, and of course…worst of all…the lie he'd told Quistis about the money crossed his mind. There was no way he would be able to make enough money to pay her back. He couldn't believe he hadn't thought of that before he decided to spill his guts and tell her he loved her. 

Whatever happened, he could not betray her trust. 

"Hmm?"

"Nothing." It was disheartening to remember what he'd been up to before he fell in love with her. But somehow he'd have to pay her back…some how…

"When do you leave?" Seifer asked, changing the subject. 

"A couple days from now…" Quistis replied, "why?" she then asked. 

"I…was considering that offer you made a while ago." 

Quistis looked at Seifer blankly for a moment. "Oh," she said, "about returning with me to Balamb Garden?" 

Seifer nodded.

Quistis broke away from Seifer, then gave a thoughtful expression. "The offer's still there if you want to go."

"Good." Seifer smiled a genuine smile. "I really _do think that a new life is in order…after all, I want to be spending the rest of my --"   Seifer stopped short. He couldn't even believe he had just said that. _

Quistis looked at him, as if she wanted to hear the rest of what he was about to say, but she didn't prod on. 

Instead, she stepped to a side, and stared out the window. "It's going to be great, starting over…" Quistis said quietly. She wasn't sure if she was saying that to Seifer, or to herself. After all…she _was starting over herself, wasn't she? She was starting afresh with this newfound love of Seifer's. And Seifer too was starting over._

She turned to look at Seifer who was sitting at the edge of the bed, obviously thinking deeply about something. She noticed the serious, almost guilty expression on his face. "Seifer, are you okay?"

Seifer snapped out of his reverie then blinked as he saw Quistis' face. "Yeah, I'm fine." 

"Love's a strange thing…" Quistis murmured. Seifer nodded. "It is." He agreed. 

                             *        *        *

When Seifer left Quistis' room that night, he felt a whole bundle of emotions wrapped into one. He felt anger at himself and his lies, guilt for having to lie in the first place, love for Quistis, hunger from not having eaten anything all day, and exhaustion. He had been thinking way too much for it to be good health.

When he opened the door to the room that he and his friends stayed in, he noticed Fujin and Raijin were playing a game of cards. "Hey Seif," Raijin said, grinning at him. 

Seifer waved a hand lazily, and then proceeded into the bathroom. He turned the tap of the shower, and stripped off his trench-coat, pants, shirt, and the rest of his clothing. When the water began to steam, Seifer stepped into the shower, hoping that the hot water would rinse not only the sweat off him, but the haunting thoughts and lies he had fed to Quistis. 

When he stepped out of the shower, he heard Fujin and Raijin's shouting. Obviously Fujin was winning the game, and Raijin was having a fit of  poor sportsmanship. He chuckled, wishing situations like this were the only things he had to worry about. 

When he was fully dressed, he joined his friends. Raijin didn't seem to be taking losing very well. "Seif, tell Fujin that I am the winner. I had one point over her, and then all of a sudden, she cheats, ya know?"

"LIAR." Fujin growled, slamming the cards on the floor. She pointed to herself and declared, "WINNER!"

Seifer merely laughed. "Sorry Raij, you're on your own." Raijin frowned and sulked for a moment. "So where were you?" Raijin asked. 

The question took him off guard for a moment. _Hadn't he…no. Seifer realized he hadn't told Raijin about Quistis yet. Fujin gave Seifer a warning glance, as if now wasn't the time to tell him._

Raijin never liked Quistis either. 

"Well…" Seifer knew he had to tell him eventually, so why not now? "I was at—"

"HUNGRY." Fujin suddenly said. 

"Fujin, stop. I have to tell him," Seifer said. Fujin fell silent.

"What's this about? I'm kinda lost, ya know?" Raijin said, turning his gaze from Seifer to Fujin, and back again.

"I was at Quistis'. I…well…we, er…we're going to go back to Balamb Garden with her." 

Raijin stared at him, and even Fujin gave a startled gasp. "BALAMB?" Fujin asked in surprise. 

"Yes." Seifer answered. "For Hyne's sake. Don't act so bloody surprised. It was going to happen eventually," he snapped irritated. He hated having to explain himself like this. 

"No it wasn't, Seif. We were never going to go back, remember? We vowed never to. Now you're breaking your promise, ya know?" Raijin said. 

"I'm doing no such thing. Would you rather stay here in this damned hell-hole working for Fletcher until your back breaks, or would you rather start over in Balamb Garden where we may actually have a chance to be SeeDs again?" Seifer snapped, trying to get his ideas across. 

"It's not possible. Balamb hates us. We sided with the Sorceress Ultimecia, remember?" Raijin said, leaning back.

"EXACTLY." 

"But I'm sure if we talked to Cid, and Quistis…she'll help us out," Seifer pointed out. Fujin eyed her friend suspiciously. This was what love did to someone…turn them vulnerable. But she had to admit…he looked much happier than he used to. 

"What about Squall, and them? You can't forget what they think of us, ya know?" Raijin interjected. 

Seifer looked thoughtful for a moment, as if he hadn't even thought about Puberty Boy and the rest of the Scooby gang. But the fact was, he had. It was the only thing on his mind when Quistis had first suggested he come back to Balamb Garden. They would ridicule them until they gave in and lashed out. But that wasn't going to happen this time. Not when he had Quistis.

"You're right…but I'm willing to take the chance. Aren't you?" 

Raijin and Fujin were silent for a moment. They exchanged glances with each other, then looked at Seifer's expression: one that was, for the first time, full of hope. He _really wanted to do this. He really wanted to start over. And the fact of the matter was, they did too._

They all wanted to be rid of the life they had here in Deling City. They wanted to return to the only place they knew as home. Balamb Garden.

"FINE."

"Yea…we'll give it a chance. Can't be that bad being on the Disciplinary Committee again, ya know?" Raijin said with a grin. 

Seifer smirked, grateful. 

"Now what's all this about Quistis? I'm kinda confused about that, ya know?" Raijin asked. 

Seifer stood up and paced for a bit. He didn't know how to tell him all of a sudden. He took a deep breath and began to re-tell his story to his two best friends.

"A few days ago, when we met up with her at the Bar…that was the first time I'd seen her since the Sorceress Wars. We were low on money. So I went to her, intent on getting money off her. To me she was nothing but a gullible client that I'd rob. I guess I wasn't prepared for the reality of it." 

"And what's the reality?" Raijin asked. 

Fujin crossed her arms, but her expression said "Go on…" 

"The reality of it was…I was attracted to her. And now that attraction is—"

"Oh no. No, no, no…" Raijin stared at Seifer, obviously appalled, "and now you love her." 

Seifer nodded.

"Well, this complicates things, ya know? Is that why you wanted to go back to Balamb Garden?" 

"Partly. Another reason is because I hate it here. I always did. We were never invited back to Balamb Garden, so I figured we were unwanted there. But Quistis…she suggested it. Isn't that a sort of invitation? And now that we're…well, I _want to go back now." _

  
Fujin sighed. "ONE PROBLEM." 

Raijin looked at her, and then agreed with a nod. "Yeah, how are we gonna get rid of Fletcher?" 


	8. The Difference Between Heaven and Hell

Disclaimer: I don't own FF8, or any of its characters, and I'm not part of Squaresoft. All events in this story are completely fiction, and the only thing I own is the storyline and those events.  
  
Authors Note: After a LOOOOOOOOOONG LONG LONG break from writing this fic, I decided to go back to it and write some more and then upload it. ^^ Enjoy! Please note that this chapter has a little make-out scene in it. I've made it more vague so I wouldn't scare away the PG-13 readers.^^;; Maybe I'll try writing a more detailed scene in another story later. Anyway, after reading, I'd appreciate if you left a comment. Thanks so much to everyone for all the support I've gotten from you guys! ^^  
  
------------------- Orphan at Heart -------------------  
  
Written by: Lixia  
  
CHAPTER 8 - The Difference Between Heaven and Hell  
  
The next night was a nightmare for Seifer. Though Fletcher was glad to see his goods in one piece, he had another mission for Seifer and his friends. Seifer told Fletcher he didn't want to be part of his brigade of thieves. In other words, he had told Fletcher to 'shove it' and was about to walk out of the building where Fletcher met them. Was, until a bullet was shot Seifer's way by one of Fletcher's men. He was lucky to move out of the way before the bullet could bury itself in Seifer's arm, but it was still there. "I don't think you really want to be walking out on me just yet." Fletcher dared him.  
  
Seifer growled, but he was starting to feel the pain in his arm. It began to cloud his senses. Fujin and Raijin, who had been with Seifer could only gape, partly in fear, as they raced to tend to their friend. Being shot was not what they had in mind. Seifer waved them off, and with a weak smirk of confidence, he asked Fletcher what it was he wanted. Though death seemed very inviting at the moment, all he could think about was the blonde haired lady he loved and could not abandon.  
  
And so it was back in the grimy hotel room that Seifer's wound was being poorly treated. Raijin knew a thing or two about gunshot wounds, but the pain was unbearable. Once Raijin was done, Seifer could breathe better.  
  
"How are we gonna get rid of him, Seifer? How?" Raijin muttered, as he stitched up the cut. Seifer winced in pain. "How the hell should I know? Hyne, he's said over and over that each mission would be our last. Then we would be free. But each time he's lied. Why I even bothered to believe him the first time is beyond me." "CROOK." "You're right, Fuu. He's a bloody good-for-nothing crook. We're gonna be working for him till we die ya know?" Raijin sighed. "We won't. We're going to leave after this last mission. We're going to go back to Balamb Garden. I won't stay here anymore. If he doesn't know where we are, we're safe, right?" Seifer asked them, as Raijin finished up with his wound. Neither of them said anything, which was perfectly fine with Seifer, because he needed to hear those words of encouragement. He needed to hear them, and believe them, and he couldn't stand to have anyone disagree. It would shatter his hope.  
  
* * *  
  
Quistis watched the busy streets through her window, and sighed contentedly. What happened the previous night had been perfect. It was something, she figured, that would happen in a Romance novel. So did that mean their relationship would last? Or would it be end in tragedy? "Quit thinking about things so negatively." she muttered to herself. When they returned to Balamb Garden, everything would be perfect. She would be with Seifer, enjoying everyday as if it was her last. She would wish Rinoa and Squall a happy marriage and she would forget about Squall in the way she used to wish for him. She picked up the alarm clock she brought from home, and stared at the face. It read 6:30 PM. In half an hour, Seifer would come to her door, as he had during that time for the past four days. And this time it would be so much more different than it used to be. Because this time they were honest about their feelings for one another.  
  
Seifer arrived at Quistis' hotel room a little earlier than usual. Since morning, he had been looking forward to one thing: meeting up with Quistis. He felt like he was involved in some rendition of Romeo and Juliet, where he would visit his Juliet every night. Except there was no balcony, and there were no parents threatening to kill each other in a battle. And this time there was going to be no tragic ending. He would be with her forever. Fletcher could take his conniving brains and shove it up his ass for all he cared. When she opened the door, her hair had been let down, and she had a brush in her hand. She looked like an angel to him. "Quistis." he breathed. Quistis smiled at him but her smile faded when she suddenly noticed that she wasn't looking her best at the moment. Hastily she led him into her room, then grabbed any elastic band to tie up her long locks of blonde hair. "No, leave it," Seifer said softly, taking in her beauty. Quistis stopped while her hands were in mid-air and let them drop to her side. She blushed slightly. "Oh, quit gaping, Almasy," Quistis joked. Somehow it was a weak way to stop him from gazing at her intently.  
  
Seifer seemed to obey; however, only for a moment. Instead of gaping, he moved towards her. Quistis barely had the time to catch her breath when Seifer's hands gently grabbed her arms. It felt tingly, the way he touched her. "Quistis." In the heat of the moment, Quistis didn't notice that her heart was beating fast, faster than she could remember. She felt as if she would melt right into Seifer's arms. And then he gently lifted her chin towards him, gazed into her eyes, then brought his lips to meet hers. Quistis' immediate reaction was to back away as she wasn't used to kissing, but soon her lips softened to Seifer's when she realized he wouldn't hurt her. A sudden desire overcame her, something she'd never felt before. Could it be that I've always been attracted to Seifer? She wondered. It seemed so. The elastic band she had in her hand dropped to the floor, and the kisses she shared with Seifer deepened, adding more and more passion. When they broke off their kiss, Seifer maneuvered Quistis over to her double-sized bed and lay her down. Neither of them could think as they went with their instinct, their lust for each other suddenly growing stronger. Soon their clothes were strewn over the pink carpeted floor, and they lay in each other's arms. "Seifer, I love you." Quistis whispered into his ear, as the two of them shared an intimate moment. Seifer smiled, kissing her again. "I love you too, Quistis Trepe."  
  
By the end of the night, they had shared an incredible experience with each other. One they would treasure for the rest of their lives. Quistis lay her head on Seifer's chest, her golden hair sprawled around her. Closing her eyes, she sighed contentedly, and listened to the quick beating of Seifer's heart. Seifer leaned over slightly and kissed the top of her head. Then the two of them fell into a content and easy sleep.  
  
When the sun's rays spilled into Quistis' hotel room the next morning, warm and inviting, Quistis awoke. She turned over to find Seifer next to her, and it brought back the previous night. She smiled, remembering how they'd made love. It was going to change her forever. She gently lifted her hand to Seifer's sleeping face, tracing the scar that spread from his nose to his forehead. Suddenly Seifer stirred, and he opened his eyes revealing emerald green. "Good morning," Quistis smiled. Seifer returned the smile. "Good morning to you too." His expression suddenly turned serious. "Wait, what time is it?" he asked. Quistis' expression mirrored his. "Why? What's wrong?" But she sat up and grabbed her alarm clock. "Nine thirty," she replied. "Oh shit." Seifer jumped out of bed, bare buttocks and all. Quistis giggled. "The least you could do is put on some pants." Seifer looked down at himself and reached down to grab his discarded boxers.  
  
When he was fully re-clothed, he kissed Quistis then apologized for leaving so soon. Quistis understood he probably had his job to go to, and waved him off. Once he closed the door behind him, leaving Quistis in the bed, she collapsed against the pillows and smiled at the ceiling. Quistis Trepe, who used to be a cold-hearted unreachable soul had suddenly found light in her life, and true happiness. And she loved it. 


	9. Leaving Everything Behind

Disclaimer: This story is fully fictional. I do not own any of the characters, and I am not part of Squaresoft. I own the storyline and that's about it.

Authors Note: Not much to say. It's Chapter Nine. I never knew I'd get up to Chapter Nine! Aiii!

Anyway, enjoy! Leave a comment after reading it! Thanks!

--------------------

Orphant at Heart

--------------------

Written by: Lixia

CHAPTER 9 – Leaving Everything Behind

Raijin and Fujin were situated in their grimy hotel room. Raijin sat on the floor, his back leaning against the wall, while Fujin stood pacing around the room.

"Where could he be? He's been gone all night…y'don't think…"

"NO."

"Then…"  
  


"SEIFER…STRONG." 

"Yea, I guess you're right."  They sat in momentary silence, unsure of what to do with their worried thoughts. It was 11:00 AM. 

The truth of the matter was Seifer had gone out for the night, and remained absent even until now. Both Fujin and Raijin hadn't come to any conclusions about _how Seifer had spent his night, but they had suspicions._

Suddenly the handle to their hotel room door twisted and turned before a rather out-of-breath Seifer entered the room. Raijin's eyes widened as if he'd never seen Seifer before, while Fujin's stare remained cool. 

"I hate to sound like a mother, but where have you been Seif? You've been gone the whole night, ya know?"

Seifer shrugged, "Sorry. I just…uhh...had to take care of some things." He shed his trench coat and headed to the bathroom. 

Fujin's gaze followed him as he went to the bathroom.

"QUISTIS?" 

Both men turned to her. "What?" Raijin asked, in an expression of seemingly utmost horror. 

Seifer didn't reply. Instead he turned on the tap and splashed water on his face. 

"WELL?"

Seifer walked into the bedroom, and wiped his face off with a towel. "Yeah…"

Raijin rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "So we're really goin' to Balamb Garden then? To re-enroll? Would Cid let us?" 

"I don't know. We can try though, can't we? It beats staying here." 

"Like you've said a hundred times," Raijin muttered. "I just don't know why you've suddenly taken such a liking to the Instructor that's all. It kinda scares me, ya know?" 

"Scares you?" 

Raijin nodded. "Forget it, eh? So when do we leave?"

Seifer eyed his friend closely for a moment then shrugged, "Tomorrow." 

Fujin blinked. "TOMORROW?" She sat on the bed, suddenly afraid of her legs becoming too weak to hold her up. 

"How are we gonna get tickets and whatever else?" Raijin asked.

"That's what _these_ are for." Seifer held up three tickets for the Deling Train. 

"How'd you get these?" Raijin asked. 

"This morning when…" _I left Quistis' room…_ "I was on my way back here, I picked up these. I have to visit Quistis tonight just to get the rest of the information, but be ready to leave tomorrow morning." Seifer handed a ticket to each of his friends. 

"We'll have to avoid any Fletcher-like business for today. Just so he won't realize we're missing. He'll figure we killed ourselves or something." 

"Wouldn't he try to look for us?"

"I hope not. But I can't stay here anymore. I just can't." 

                                                                   *        *        *

That evening, Seifer's visit to Quistis involved thorough discussion of their plans for the next day. They sat on her bed talking, until Quistis got up to pack her bags. She had previously gotten two of her bags packed, and had one left to go. 

"Here, let me help you," Seifer offered, as he picked up a couple bags filled with souvenirs for Quistis' friends.

"Thanks," Quistis smiled. "So are you excited?"

"Excited?" Seifer laid one of the gifts into Quistis' suitcase. He shrugged. 

"Yeah. You know…to be happy about going somewhere…"

"I _know what it means. I just don't know if I'm excited or not. I'm relieved, if that counts for anything. But excited?"_

Quistis sighed, as she let one of the gifts fall back onto her blanket. She approached Seifer and laid a hand gently on his shoulder. "Well, whatever it is you're feeling, I'm here for you, okay?"

Seifer broke out into a smile, melting his serious expression. "I know. Thanks Quistis." 

"Of course." She resumed to packing the gifts. 

It took half an hour until everything was all set. "Have _you got everything packed up?" Quistis asked, realizing he'd spent most of his time with her that evening._

Seifer shrugged. "I don't exactly have much to begin with, but yeah, Raijin and Fujin have got that covered." 

"Oh, good. I want to thank you for helping me pack tonight." 

Smiling, Seifer nodded. "Any time." 

Quistis rose from the spot she'd taken on her bed, and stretched. "Hyne, I'm tired. What time is it?"

"Nearly ten."

"Shouldn't you be going back?" 

"Maybe."

"Then what…"

"I just wanted to stay a little longer…so I could just look at you." 

A red blush fell across Quistis' face. "Oh, Seifer…" 

Seifer got up from his seat and walked towards Quistis. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever met…even when we weren't exactly on good terms, I knew that." 

Quistis smiled, feeling a little embarrassed at being complimented by him. "You're such a flatterer." 

"I mean it." He chuckled, and kissed her. 

                                                *        *        *

Seifer returned to the motel-room by eleven o'clock. Fujin and Raijin had small bundles packed that held their belongings. It wasn't much. Most of their belongings consisted of potions. 

"Had dinner, guys?"

Raijin shook his head. "Nah. We decided to skip that off. So, y'went to the Instructor then?" 

Seifer nodded. "Got all the information. We leave bright and early tomorrow morning." 

"OKAY." 

"This is a good idea, right?" Raijin asked, in an almost unsure tone of voice.

"Of course it is. Why wouldn't it be?"

"Well…y'sure you're not just going because you love the Instructor? You're going because—"

"Whoa, Raijin. What are you talking about?" Seifer demanded, more or less appalled. 

"Nothing…it's just…"

Fujin shook her head. "SMART." She pointed to Seifer, then sighed at Raijin. 

"I know he's smart…but it could be an infatuation. Y'never know, Seif. People do strange things when they're in love, ya know? How do you know we'll get outta here? Do you know that for a fact?"

Seifer crossed his arms. "Since when did you become such a pessimist, Raijin?"

Raijin shrugged. "Since you fell for Quistis."

"Do you not like her?"

"She's with Garden. She used to be your enemy, Seif. How do you know you're not goin' back to Balamb Garden just to be caught by authorities and be sent to prison? She could be setting you up, ya know?"

Shocked, Seifer didn't know how to answer his best friend. _His best friend._ How could Raijin doubt what he knew? He _knew Quistis was to be trusted. Hyne, he trusted her with his entire being. Why else would he give his heart to her, just as she'd given her heart to him? Angry now, Seifer shook his head._

"You don't know what you're talking about, Raijin. Quistis is a good person; she wouldn't do that. And you'd better get used to the fact that I love her," he snapped. 

He walked into the washroom, closed the door behind him, and turned on the shower, leaving Raijin feeling regretful for what he'd said.

Fujin shook her head at Raijin with a _now-look-what-you've-done expression on her face. She crossed to the window and looked out of it. _

Raijin sighed. "I didn't mean to upset him, ya know? I just wanna be cautious." 

"FORGET IT."

"But--" 

Fujin turned to him with a sharp look. It silenced Raijin. That evening was going to be tense, Raijin knew. And it was all because of him. 

Early the next morning, the three ex-Disciplinary Committee members left their motel room, paying the man at the lobby before departing. Each had a small package of belongings, slung over their shoulders. The morning air was crisp and cool, filled with anxiety and excitement. 

So it _was excitement, Seifer thought, noticing how loud his boots were on the pavement now. The morning seemed unborn; there was hardly a stir. For a busy city, everyone seemed to have a set curfew. A faint fog surrounded the many buildings about them, and it was calm._

In half an hour, they had arrived at the train station. People were walking everywhere, obviously ready for an early start to their destinations just like them. Seifer searched the diminutive station for any sign of the blonde woman they were to meet. A hint of doubt filled his mind then. _What if Raijin was right, and Quistis set us up? What if she's not even here because she's calling the authorities? _

Shaking his head, and silently cursing Raijin for filling his mind with doubt, Seifer continued searching for Quistis.

"The Train to Balamb City will be leaving in half an hour!" the train-master called out. Raijin shifted uneasily. "Y'don't think—"

"Seifer!" 

Breathing a sigh of relief, Seifer waved at the blonde woman a distance off before them. He gripped his belongings tighter and made his way through the crowd of people towards his loved one. 

"Quistis, thank Hyne you're here."

"Of course I'd be here. Why wouldn't I be? I'm leaving too you know." She laughed gently.

"Yeah, I know…it's just…nevermind." Seifer scratched the back of his head nervously, trying to laugh it off.

"We'd better board the train," Quistis suggested, her blue eyes watched the large terminal clocks. 

"You're right. Let's go," Seifer said to his two friends. 

"QUISTIS." Fujin greeted Quistis. Raijin nodded to her. Quistis felt a little hostility coming from Seifer's friends, but she ignored it.

The group boarded the trains, and found their seats. Quistis took a moment to pack her smaller bags into the compartment, while the train-stewards took her larger luggage to the carriage area. Once everyone had been seated and settled in, an announcement came from the PA system telling them they would be heading off. 

It seemed like an eternity before the train actually began to move. Seifer felt a little nervous, and the feeling of anxiety remained a deep dark pit in his stomache. He didn't notice anything else around him, but kept his stare on the interior of the train station before they became distanced with it. Once they reached the outside of the station, Seifer watched the buildings pass them by. Slowly Deling City was becoming nothing but a tiny toy-town…and soon they would be away from it all.

Deling City would be just another nightmare. 


	10. Preparation

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story, nor am I a part of Squaresoft. This story is for entertainment purposes only.

Authors Note: So Seifer's out of Deling! Seems almost too good to be true, huh? Well, the end of the story isn't here, folks! ^^

Please read and leave a comment afterwards! It would be much appreciated! **Thank you to all the loyal readers of this story. Without you guys, this story wouldn't be where it is now! ^^**

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**Orphan At Heart**

--------------------

Written by: Lixia

**CHAPTER 10 – Preparation**

Watching him with a distant caution, Quistis felt Seifer's uneasy tension. "Is something the matter?" she finally asked.

Seifer seemed to snap out from his reverie. "No, I'm fine." 

Quistis reached for his hand, and squeezed it with a loving reassurance. Seifer squeezed it back, and tried to smile. 

_No. Nothing is the matter anymore. Fletcher's gone. We're away from Deling now. _

Seifer turned his head to the window for a moment again, realizing that there really _was nothing to worry about anymore. Deling's tall buildings were no where to be seen anymore. Everything was going to be fine. Headmaster Cid would allow them to be part of Balamb Garden's population and they would get their wheels back on track, so to speak. _

Seifer and Quistis held hands a while longer, before she let go to reach for her purse. Curious as to what she was doing, Seifer watched as she unzipped her bag. 

She pulled out a small cellular phone, and turned it on. "I'm going to tell Headmaster Cid that we're coming," she explained, noticing Seifer's bewildered expression.

Seifer nodded, then leaned back against his seat, shutting his eyes. _Please let us be re-admitted…_he thought in his mind. 

Quistis left their little cabin to gain a better reception with her cellphone. Seifer sighed, anxiety eating at his stomache. 

"Hyne, when was the last time I was _this nervous?" he muttered to himself grumpily. _

"Check it out, Seif!" Raijin called, breaking Seifer's thought. Seifer looked up to see Raijin and Fujin standing at the entrance of his cabin. 

"LOOK." Fujin held up a set of towels, and other hygienic accessories. 

"Can't remember the last time we actually had money to use these things, ya know?" he grabbed one of the clean towels and stuffed it in his face. "Mmm…clean towels!" 

Seifer burst out laughing. "You're such an idiot, Raijin!" 

Raijin grinned. He chucked the towel at Seifer's face. "Well, it's true, ya know! I may actually be likin' this idea of going back to Garden now."

"FREE MEALS."

"Yea! The cafeteria! I wonder if they've improved the food. They always had a shortage of hot dogs, ya know?" 

Seifer nodded, glad that his friends were here to distract him. It calmed his distraught nerves a bit to know that his friends were enthusiastic about going back now. He didn't want to have to convince them anymore.

Quistis reentered the cabin. "Looks like a full house here," she remarked. Raijin smiled. "Hey, Instructor. How are ya?" 

"Not too bad, Raijin. I spoke with the Headmaster, and he'll greet us at the entrance when we get there. I suspect he wants to see you three for himself. But there's a good chance he'll re-admit you three," Quistis explained. Her voice, as she spoke, sounded like she was describing a mission to them, Seifer noticed. It reminded him of the first time they were on a mission together—back when he took the SeeD exam. It was there that Quistis explained to them what they would be doing—much like she was here—and he didn't even listen to her. Hyne, he never wanted to listen to her, because he thought she talked way too much.

Now, listening to her, he knew he was so wrong. Everything she did, she did it because she wanted them to know what they were doing. It was for their own good, and he failed to see it. 

"GOOD." Fujin nodded, bringing Seifer back to reality. 

                                      *        *        *        *

Quistis turned her gaze to Fujin, studying her stone-faced features. Fujin's tone never changed, and she hadn't added more words to her monotonous sentences, she noticed. Both she and Raijin seemed to have remained the same throughout the years of their disappearance.  It was only Seifer who seemed to have changed because he was really, the leader of their small 'posse'. He had become much more cautious of what he was getting himself into, knowing that the first time he had acted on instinct; it got him into a bad situation with a Sorceress intent on stopping the world. 

In a way, it had changed him for the better. No longer was Seifer as arrogant and confident about what he was doing: he was more willing to listen to someone else than he had before. Of course, when Quistis met up with Seifer for the first time since the Sorceress Wars, Seifer seemed to be the same old arrogant bastard she knew long ago.

Yet, he had opened up to her; eventually…it was something he'd _never done before. Not until after the wars. He had actually taken a chance to get to know her, and she did too. _

And it worked out for the better, which made Quistis smile. 

"What are you smiling about?" Raijin asked, picking up a toothbrush and inspecting it.   
Quistis shook her head, "Nothing, sorry." She cleared her throat. "So I hope you three will look presentable when we arrive in Balamb Garden." 

Raijin lifted his hand in a salute, "Yes Instructor. I know what I'm doing, ya know? I'll make the Headmaster an offer he can't refuse." He raised the toothbrush in front of him as if he was wielding the sword. 

Fujin threw a pillow at him. "FOOL." She laughed. The rest of them followed. 

In a moment's time, Seifer stopped laughing. There was something edging at the back of his mind, dark and suffocating. Suddenly he felt warmth touch his hand. "Are you okay?" Quistis asked softly. 

Seifer watched the scenery pass them by, then nodded, "Yeah. Yeah I'm fine." He said to her, though it seemed arguable that he was trying to reassure himself. He usually didn't feel this edgy, not unless there really _was something out there. But their train was moving, and there was no way anyone could find the exact cabin they were in._

Or so he thought.


	11. Happiness Doesn't Last Forever

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story, nor am I a part of Squaresoft. This story is for entertainment purposes only.

Authors Note: Chapter 10 was probably the shortest chapter of this story. This chapter should probably have been blended into Chapter 10, but I decided that an update for the story was gravely needed. Next chapter should be a mixture of angst and happiness. =) A BIG thank you to those who have read this story and commented. Especially to those who have been following from chapter 1 to now. 

--------------------

**Orphan At Heart**

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Written by: Lixia

CHAPTER 11 – Happiness Doesn't Last Forever

Night fell quickly on them and the train continued its long trip from Deling to Balamb. Quistis and Seifer lay in each others arms, not so much with a feeling of lust in their hearts, but more for the sake of comfort and love. Seifer wanted to hold her, and she let him, and the two of them slept soundly in the small cabin. Quistis slept more soundly than Seifer, however.

By late night, Seifer began having nightmares that involved his friends and Quistis in danger. He was unable to save them all from a large dark figure who saw them through their cabin window. 

_"You will never win." The voice whispered into his ear. "I've already won, Seifer Almasy. I have already won, and you will die. I will kill you, and your loved ones."_

_Suddenly a sword came out of nowhere and though he could not feel it, he saw the blood pool from his chest, a large flood of sticky thick liquid. He plunged his hand into the wound, hoping to stop it from bleeding, but it only made it worse. The wound grew bigger, and his hand, as he lifted it from the wound, was dripping with his own blood._

_  
"What have you done?" a soft voice asked him. Golden blonde hair, shining like the sun bent down towards his face. He looked up with sad eyes and met the lovely eyes of Quistis Trepe. "What have you done, Seifer? You've killed me." _

_Raijin and Fujin stood behind her. "You've killed us, Seifer. You've killed us."_

_"I didn't!" Seifer protested. "I…I tried to save you…I…" he trailed off; there was too much blood loss. He began to fall into a never ending black pit. "I tried to save you…" he tried to yell, but his throat didn't work anymore. _

He woke up with a jolt. The sudden movement brought Quistis out of her own dreams. She blinked then raised her head to meet Seifer's own panic-stricken expression. "What's wrong?" she asked him. She lifted a hand to touch his face.

"Nothing…" Seifer said automatically, trying to smile. "Just…a bad dream, that's all." Quistis returned the smile, gently stroking his chin. "Okay…go back to sleep then," she said. He nodded, then bent down to kiss her lips. "Good night, Trepe." 

She shifted her position a bit to snuggle against him. "Good night, Almasy," she replied. 

He lay back against the soft bed, and stared up at the ceiling instead, listening to the wheels of the train over the tracks. It wasn't so much that it was particularly noisy, but the sound was noticeable. 

By the time he began to doze off, light was beginning to pour through the cracks of the blinds of their window. He was concerned about the strange nightmare he had, wondering what it held for him. Was it a premonition of some sort? He hoped not. He couldn't lose what was most precious to him, now that he had finally found it. And he could never lose his friends, because they were his life. He settled back against the pillow and shut his eyes. Nightmares were all it was. He fell asleep.

                                      *        *        *

Quistis awoke to find that Seifer was asleep. She knew he hadn't had an easy sleep throughout the night. The proof of that was in his expression when he awoke her. She wished she could take away whatever fear he had, for that was what showed on his face. The nightmare must have been truly frightening, she thought. She watched his chest rise and fall to the rhythm of his breathing for a little while longer, mesmerized by him, before she decided it was time to get ready.

She shifted so she didn't have to disturb him, then got out of the bed. She wanted to look out the window, but the harsh sun's rays would wake Seifer up, and she didn't want to do that. Instead, she crossed the small room towards the small compartment that was to be their closet, got changed, fixed her hair, and left the room. 

She walked along the corridor, lined with large windows and hugging herself, watched the scenery pass her by. Balamb, here we come, she thought.

                                      *        *        *

Seifer turned over in the bed to meet one of the sun's rays that escaped through the blinds. Squinting, he tried to turn so he could continue sleeping, but it was too late. He was already awake. Instead he opened his eyes and yawned. Quistis was gone, he noticed, and that left him the entire room to himself for now. He contemplated lying where he was for another hour or so, but the grumble in his stomache forced him to consider other options, such as breakfast. He sat up just as Quistis re-entered the room.

"Good morning, sleepyhead," she said with a bright smile on her face. 

"You look awfully cheery this morning."

Quistis nodded, proceeding to open the blinds of their cabin. "Why shouldn't I be? We'll be home in a couple more hours."

"Home. You make it sound like I've already been reaccepted." Seifer watched her as she carefully opened the blinds.

"You worry too much. Headmaster Cid is forgiving. When he sees that you really mean to do well in Balamb Garden, he'll let you back in for sure." Quistis, having finished with the blinds walked over to the bed and sat down next to Seifer. 

He stared into her blue eyes and knew that she trusted in Headmaster Cid to readmit them. "You're right," he said finally. Quistis cocked her head, raising an eyebrow. 

"Of course I'm right. Really, Seifer…you worry too much." 

Neither of them said a word for a long moment; the sound of railroad tracks continued to roll beneath them. Suddenly, Seifer's stomache gave a cry of hunger. 

"Breakfast?" Quistis asked, grinning. Seifer smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, don't think I can keep my stomache quiet any longer." 

They both got up and headed out of the compartment only to meet up with Fujin and Raijin who seemed to be making their way towards their cabin room. 

"Good morning," Quistis said. 

"MORNING."

"Right back at ya both," Raijin said. "Great day, ya know?"

"Yes." Seifer didn't want to worry his friends and forced himself to keep a smile upon his face. 

The four of them made their way into the dining cabin where others sharing train cabins were eating breakfast. Seifer felt uneasy around so many people. What if one of them was here to get him? He turned to see that Quistis seemed to be enjoying herself and shook his head of all negative thought. Or he tried.

Fujin and Raijin didn't spare any time to grab a plate and approach the buffet tables. Taking as much food as he could carry, Raijin headed straight to an empty table near one of the windows, Fujin following closely behind when she had taken her own share of food. Quistis left Seifer standing where he was, and he did not notice until she gently called him from his stupor. "Seifer, I thought you were hungry?"

Seifer snapped out of his trance and grinned. "Yeah." He took a plate and absent-mindedly picked up some waffles, butter, and pieces of toast. Then he walked to the table, leaving Quistis at the buffet. 

"Guys, you haven't been feeling like someone's been watching us have you?" Seifer asked them, taking a seat across from Raijin. 

Both of them shook their heads. "WHY?"

"Have you been feelin' awkward, Seif? Cuz we've been havin' a ball, ya know?" 

"I don't want to worry any of you, but…I can't help but think that we're making a mistake here." 

"MISTAKE?"

"How?"

"I…" Seifer could no longer discuss it when Quistis walked towards the table, her breakfast in her hands. 

Fujin and Raijin remained unnaturally silent as they all ate their breakfast. People around them seemed to be the only source of sound to Seifer; everyone at his table was just that quiet. 

"Well," Seifer cleared his throat. "Everyone seems a bit quiet, huh?"

"I've noticed that too," Quistis said in agreement. "Are you all right?" she asked Fujin and Raijin.

Both of them nodded vigorously. "YES. FINE."

"Of course, ya know?"

Quistis eyed them in suspicion but shrugged. "Okay." 

Suddenly a voice came over the speakers in their dining cabin, making the soft music emitting from the speakers stop. The muffled static-filled voice announced that they would be in Balamb Train Station in another hour, give or take a few minutes. 

Seifer was suddenly quite worried, although he couldn't figure out why. 

Once breakfast was done, and their stomaches full, the group went back to their cabin rooms to pack up whatever belongings they had in preparation of leaving the train once it had arrived at their destination. 

As Seifer was tying up the bag he owned, full of his belongings, Quistis watched him from the corner of her eye. He seemed highly edgy for some reason, although she hadn't noticed it until then. She tried to get him to talk to her about it, but he shrugged it off and assured her he was fine. She knew better. 

"Seifer—"

"I'm fine, Quistis. Really," Seifer said for the hundredth time. It was starting to become slightly irritating to him that Quistis wanted to help him so much. He shouldn't need any help. Hyne, he was fine, wasn't he? He was going to find a better life style; it was like a second chance! Then why the hell was he so jittery? 

Quistis didn't say anything else. 

"Arriving at Balamb Station in fifteen minutes." 

"Oh, good…we're almost there," Quistis said forty-five minutes later. They hadn't talked, but continued packing until the train's announcement caused them both to jump slightly, at the sound of something other than the rhythmic railroad tracks. 

"Yeah," Seifer agreed. What was with the sudden awkward feelings between them? Seifer thought, almost miserably. "Listen, Quistis…" he started. 

"I know you're fine, Seifer…You've said so yourself. I am just worried, because you don't _seem_ fine. You've been pretty quiet and jittery all morning. That, to me is not a sign of fine-ness," Quistis explained. 

Seifer sighed. "You're absolutely right. I guess I'm just…feeling anxious," he lied. Anxiety was not one of the feelings he was experiencing right then. He knew that if anything.

"Don't be anxious. You've been here before. This has been your home for years." 

"Train has arrived at Balamb Station. Please gather at the cabin doors once the train has come to its complete stop." 

Seifer grabbed his bag and a few of Quistis' luggage. Quistis had her own arms full of more bags and their ticket stubs. They met up with Fujin and Raijin shortly and the four of them made their way to the exits. Train attendants waited at the exit doors to wish them a good day and to thank them for using their trains. Seifer ignored them, hurrying off the train. His sense of edgyness never left him; he wanted to go to Balamb Garden before any danger could happen. 

"What is your rush, Seifer?" Quistis asked him, impatiently. Fujin and Raijin were right behind her. It almost looked like the tables had turned, and he was the outcast again. 

"Nothing," he said gruffly. Uncomfortable silence passed between them before Quistis sighed and called a cab. They loaded their luggage in and piled into the car. 

"To Balamb Garden, please," Quistis said to the driver.

"Gotcha."  Soon they were on their way to Balamb Garden. 

Seifer watched scenery pass them by out of the window. He dropped his hands at his side, and felt one touch Quistis' hand. He took it and she held onto his. Silent apology flowed through the two of them for the second time. This was it. They were going back to Balamb Garden. Wasn't this supposed to make him happy? 

_"What have you done, Seifer? You've killed me." _

_Raijin and Fujin stood behind her. "You've killed us, Seifer. You've killed us."_

No.


End file.
